It occures to me that some Catholics aren’t having their “needs” met at their local parishes. Obviously, our primary need at Church is to worship God; the fact remains, however, that we are commanded to do more than worship as a Church. It seems that in an effort to please all of the people all of the time, we are pleasing few of the people most of the time. While the primary focus of each parish, the Eucharistic, remains the same, a concerted effort should be made to “tailor make” parishes to suit the spiritual/sociological/evangelical needs of every community.
I propose the following solution:
Create “Family” parishes in every moderatly sized city, and advertize them as such. This parish will encourage family activities, like picnics, youth retreats, lock-ins, “Parent’s Night Outs”, and Sunday School classes that actually teach bible stories and make kids memorize verses* - *if the Protestants can have fun with it, so can we! The priests will receive instruction from their bishops to give family-oriented homilies, focusing on “obey thy mother/father”, love one another, love of Christ, latria and dulia, basic worship, and “Golden Rule” subjects.
Create “Apologetics” parishes in every moderately sized city, and advertize them as such. This parish will help create Apologists for the “New Evangelization” of the Catholic faith, and would have apologetics Bible study classes, materials, seminars, Latin, Greek, and Hebrew classes, and audio/library/tract resources at each parish. Homilies will consist nearly exclusively of apologetics and evangelization exegesis, and the laity will fund/host “mission trips” to bring the Light of Christ to those who don’t know it. Perhaps these priests should be Jesuits…but that is really secondary.
Create “Mature” parishes in every moderately sized city, and advertize them as such. Wheelchair and walker access, no kneelers, wide pews, soft seats, and lots of Rosaries and Eucharistic worship. Create an ***army ***of little old ladies with Rosary beads and the love of Christ. Priests will give homilies on age-appropriate topics, and focus on how to unite the suffering of each of the members to the suffering of Christ.
The remaining parishes will stay as they are now. As only one or two of each of the “Focus” parishes would be required per major city, there should be only a fairly minimal impact on those who “like it the way it is”.
Rotate priests through, but not at the expense of “specialists”. Bishops will determine, with congregational feedback, who the “specialists” are.
What do you think? Am I off my rocker, or should we petition the USCCB?