My wife is having a problem with her sister.
Basically their parents will soon be having their 50th wedding anniversary and my wife's siblings have begun to plan for it.
My wife had made some suggestions about where out of town guests could say and her sister responded with another suggestion.
My wife then said she would be happy to work on a digital media presentation like the one she did for their father's 70th birthday. This presentation was a real hit.
Her sister responded that it had already been decided that one of their inlaws would be doing this as this sister in law is very good at this.
This pattern of not so subtle put downs of any suggestion my wife makes has been repeated innumerable times during out marriage. This sister in law was my wife's maid of honor at our wedding and she had a scowl on her face practically during the entire marriage. It appears that after we had picked a name for our yet unborn child, she got wind of it and stole our name. She was conveniently preoccupied for my wife's surprise 40th birthday. She has been cold to me during our entire married life, although there could be some awkwardness due to a nasty letter she sent to my wife prior to wedding.
We have heard anecdotally that her jealousy of my wife caused a problem between her husband and herself, and that some of her close friends found her preoccupation with us to be too much and were concerned about her mental well being.
However - the question to you is how should we handle this latest barrage of nastiness from her.
My wife loves doing graphics arts is very talented in this area. I think she should do something quitely. My wife likes to be appreciated and I suspect the not so subtle jabs to keep her our is a way to thwart the joy she would have in contributing, and the appreciation her contributions would have.
I am also tempted to get involved in this situation for the first time and send my SIL an email asking her if we can discuss this with our priest who knows the both of them, and whom I suspect is aware of the problem. My reasoning is this should provoke some guilt on her part and make her realize that her actions are not holy.