My father and I were looking at an email for college application. I was sitting in my chair and he was standing behind me. I was already upset because I did not meet the required ACT score for the school I want to go to. My father, standing behind me, was making these breathing noises, and it really annoyed me, I don’t know what it is, but there is something about these little noises people make that get me really ticked off. Out of frustration/anger and annoyance I yelled the F word. It was not at my father, but I felt I disrespected him by yelling it because it was the noise he made. I know I am scrupulous, but I want to get right with God. I was hoping if someone could shed some light on this as to whether I am scrupulous in saying it could be a serious sin. Does the CCC state that frustration can hinder full consent?
If you are worried about it being a mortal sin, it definitely isn’t . Mortal sin requires full knowledge and complete consent. From what it sounds like, you were obviously frustrated and did it without thinking much. For it to be mortal sin, you would have to know it was a mortal sin, know the full seriousness of it, and do it anyway.
I think this from the catechism will help: The promptings of feelings and passions can also diminish the voluntary and free character of the offense, as can external pressures or pathological disorders. Sin committed through malice, by deliberate choice of evil, is the gravest
The offense is the mortal sin by the way. Also, you didn’t do it out of malice for your father like you said, so it is not grave.
The problem here is not whether or not your are scrupulous.
You appear to lack respect for your father. It’s not easy caring for children who are not really appreciative and think they already are grown up and knowledgeable about everything. Apologize for your cursing and try not to be so critical.
You life is only beginning. It’s hard enough. It will be an even harder road if you think you are superior and are critical of everyone around you.
Pray for patience. Pray to Our Lady for humility. Pray for your parents.
The only emotion that can really hinder full consent is fear - and then only in situations where fear is immediately effective on us (vs. acting on a long-standing fear).
I would certainly say you should confess this - it never hurts to bring something to confession, even if it’s not mortal sin. It may have caused a need for reconciliation with your father if he took it as an insult.
However, except for your use of a curse word, it is not serious sin to be angry about something that irritates you. Your frustration was directed at your situation, not at your father. Your sin was in how you chose to express that frustration, which was to curse.
My recommendation would be to use your compunction to figure out a better way to handle your irritation over this kind of sound. You’ve identified the source of the irritation and that your frustration isn’t necessarily rational. That’s more than many people do as far as being aware of your patterns of emotion and response. Now you can come up with a plan for dealing with it.
thank you for the help
Weeeellll it didn’t sound to me that Johnny did this out od a lack of respect for his father.
I have been in similar doubts, and I really do not trust myself enough to say whether or not this was sinful or not, and if yes, how severely so.
I just had to come to Johnny’s defense here saying it didn’t sound like he did it out of disrespect. But then again, how do I know this… I do not.
If we can always be in a state of love and understanding and love those around us with all their little particularities and noises and behaviors and habits and smells… that would be wonderful.
When we are in a bad mood (nervous about something, don’t feel well, tired…), that can affect our ability to be kind and loving and patient with our neighbors and family members.
Samo es when standing in line somehwere, ahving to wait… if we are already nervous becuase of something else, we are more likely to get impatient, maybe make a suppressed remark like “move it, man…” Which is NOT GOOD and should be avoided…
It helps to remember the love of God and everything we must be thankful for!! Oh and there is sooo much of it… really so much that such small annoyances should not make us “bitchy”, but then again, we are human…
Definitely the F word should not be used. This is often a habit, using that word, and can be un-learned :).
Definitely parents need to be respected.
Definitely we should try to be patient and loving with our neighbors.
Where does sin start? Often I wonder.
If I am nervous and yell at somebody out of frustration, I THINK that would not be a mortal sin, but often I have been unsure myself.
Sorry I can’t help more, just some thoughts.