Sinful Posting Of Nudity

Hello. I’m a first time poster here so I’m extremely sorry if this is in the wrong place.

I wanted to ask for advice with an issue that just came up. I want to first start off by saying that I have been a terrible Catholic. I pray at home but don’t go to church. I’ve felt terrible about this for years but, this leads into the subject.

Stupidly years ago I created an account on a pornography page and actually posted nude pictures of myself on the site. I recently have gotten into a relationship and in a moment of sharing information, I told my significant other about this page. It was still active but I hadn’t used it in a long time. They were upset when they found out and had told me that they were shocked that I could stoop to such a low level and aren’t sure they can continue moving into the direction of a relationship. They’re right. I completely had turned away from any sort of morality in darkness of loneliness and a desperation to seek validation. I am extremely remorseful and saddened by what I have done.

I’ve prayed the rosary and attended and online mass this morning. I’m mortified that I may have completely destroyed any chance with this relationship that I may have had and I want to pray for forgiveness of God and this person.

I guess what I’m asking is, what should I do? I’m going to schedule a confession with the local priest. I know going back to God is going to be the way for me to become the man I should be, serving him. I want to ask for forgiveness of God and this person and for anyone reading this to please pray for me. I was such a weak person and I can’t believe what I have done. Can anyone please help me?

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Have you taken the postings down, or contacted the site to remove your postings and profile?

That would be the first step if you truly have had a change of heart.

There is forgiveness for any sin, yours is no more or less a sin than sins done by others they are able to ask for forgiveness.

Start at the root, and work your way up from there.

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Delete the account (in my opinion prudent thing to do for your spiritual life but also for your background check during a future job search), go to Confession and move on with your life. You are not the first or last person that sinned or made stupid mistakes.

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First: I would say definitely take the page down. Try to get rid of it if you can. Go to confession, obviously you are willing to tell about this thing online, so you really shouldn’t have a problem just letting it all out in confession.

Second: I know this type of thing is certainly frowned upon, but people get into really messy situations, as you have said. After confession I would try to see what you can do about the relationship, but if it doesn’t work out that isn’t the end of life.

Third: I know relationship are suppose to be built on trust and all, but that doesn’t mean you have to bring this up again. If you go to confession, and you end that part of your life, its done, forget about it and move on. That’s not who you want to be anymore, so don’t wear it like a heavy burden, If Jesus forgives you, certainly she can try.

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I have deleted the account. I’ve also gone through and deleted any other images that I may have had and removed any sort of past connections with people that I’ve had with intentions of anything other than friendships as I do not wish to further erode any chance at things working out with this person, if they can find it in their heart to forgive me.

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I appreciate your response. I know God forgives those who seek him but I just felt like since I’ve been such a bad practicing Catholic that I need to do more.

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You took down the pics, you deleted the account. It doesn’t need to be mentioned to anyone again.

Go to confession and start going to mass.

God forgives you in confession. You need to let it go and move forward, even if it is without the current relationship.

Be at peace, and welcome to CAF!

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I am hoping that they can forgive me. I did this all stupidly and when I brought it up, they felt that I was coming off as bragging and although it may have seemed that way, I certainly didn’t mean to. I’ve been praying that God will open their heart to forgiving me. This is someone I’ve known for years and they know this is completely out of character for me. I was in a very lonely place and thought, well all of these other people have been in seemingly good relationships, if I can’t win maybe I should join them. That underminded the fact of why the person liked me so much was because I didn’t give into that sort of thing. I deeply regret it all.

Thank you for the welcome. I’ll be going to confession as soon as I can.

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We all make mistakes. I think things like this can be a big deal for some guys, but I’m sure it’s hard especially since it’s the past and you are done with that

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You can go to mass if it is available. You should probably wait on receiving the Eucharist until you go to confession. But you definitely will benefit from mass attendance. :slightly_smiling_face:

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I am a male and the female is the one I’ve hurt. A flipped script.

I attended online mass this morning. Im going to see if the church is capable of doing confession and go as soon as possible. I hate doing the old, “I messed up and I have to ask for your help.” it makes me feel like a bad kid who reaches out to ask for help but never does anything in return. :confused:. I also wonder, since I am unemployed currently, i dont have access to a therapist and wonder how much a priest can take on of one person.

You can call and perhaps schedule an appointment for a longer confession. It might take a while with Covid.

Try and get to actual mass, I really think it will help.

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I agree with those who have said to confess and then forget about telling others about it.

I would be careful to not put this girl on too much of a pedal stool. We are ALL sinners and she has probably done things in her past as well. I’m not sure she has anything to forgive you for from your past (that is between you and God) she in my opinion has to decide whether or not to accept you or not for who you are today.

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That’s what I’m hoping. She said that she just couldn’t believe that I would be that insecure and would stoop to that level of needing validation. For most people that have known me for a while, this is extremely out of character for me. I even know it. She questioned why it took her disapproval to lead me to realize it was bad and that I should being ashamed of it. Honestly, I was giving into something terrible that I know wasnt of God. :confused: I met her and realized I wanted no further part of that life and hadn’t given any attention to the account until then.

Kinda judgey on her part. People make mistakes, big and small. I wonder if this is something she is going to be capable of letting go of at all.

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I am wondering that myself. I’m not sure she’s one to handle self pity/insecurity in someone else very well. She’s definitely been hurt by men lying to her and manipulating her a fair share. I’ve apologized and took ownership of what I’ve done. I’m just hoping it’s forgivable for her as well.

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Makes you wonder about her own insecurity. If it is something you regret and are sorry for, and you go to confession, what business is it of hers to be saying anything about it as she has.

A supportive person would have been happy it is in your past, not scolded you for something you already knew was wrong.

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That was the problem. Her and I have joked about things and I took it as joking with her that I had this stupid account. Obviously, I should have NEVER done it. It was something I experimented with and realized it was vapid but I was just so caught off guard by how hurt she was and she immediately vocalized her disdain for instant gratification and lacking self respect and seeing me for not being the type of man that would allow his lust to lead him through life and it’s just not who I am. We have known each other for over a decade and she’s told me she loves how pure my intentions and my heart are, so I’m just thinking she’s speaking out of hurt and hopefully, time and God will open her heart or I’ll have felt as if I lost everything for nothing. :pensive:

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