[quote="David_Nacey, post:1, topic:447408"]
My wife has a wonderful family whom I love dearly. Unfortunately, her older sister is married to a serial cheater. Every time she finds out about a new escapade, she is deeply hurt, and it greatly affects both my wife and I. We have decided to be supportive of her, no matter what she decides to do, and she has always chosen to remain with her husband and work things out, especially for the sake of their two adorable sons, my little nephews.
My problem is that it's getting difficult for me to keep being emotionally invested in their marriage. We always visit them when we come in from out of state, and it is getting harder and harder for me to look this guy in the eye and have him cry and tell us he's getting better, and they're in therapy, and he's grown so much in his faith; when each time, we know he's lying to everyone's face, and the evidence comes out eventually that he has always indeed been lying and cheating, even while doing the therapy.
I know we'll keep supporting her, praying for their marriage, and their children, but I could use some words of wisdom and encouragement. She absolutely WILL NOT leave him. I understand and accept that as her choice and her cross to bear, and I actually commend her living sacrifice of pain and anguish. So far, there has been no extreme "drama show" in front of the kids, or threats or acts of violence. It pains us to see her suffering, but that is her own offering.
I am sorry that you have to witness such a thing. I have experience the pains of infidelity in family and it's one of the worst things people can do, to be honest.
there's not a whole lot you can do, except maybe talk to your sister-in-law, which may or may not be your place to do anyways. I admire her dedication to her marriage but it it looking like it's having the opposite effect as intended. her husband knows that she will pretty much take him back no matter what he does, for some people this ia a good insentive to just keep doing what he's doing.
again, just a generalization, I obviously don't know all the details of the situation. just be polite, be courteous, don't get too emotionally invested, because, after all, this is not your marriage. stay with other family members if it's just too awkward to stay with them. I think you are seeing things realistically that he is just pretending to change. it may be a struggle for him, but honestly, it's his own free will. He is choosing to do the things that he's doing and not treating his marriage with any kind of respect.
I really hope he is able to change so I will pray for your family