Sleeping Arrangements-Long Distance

So, I think most will agree that a couple living together before marriage is a bad idea, but my question has to do with long distance relationships. When visiting each other, is it permissible for the traveling person to sleep over in another room? I wouldn’t think staying in a hotel every time would work…

Hotels are cheap, and friends are cheaper. If you are grown up enough to date long distance and discern marriage, you are grown up enough to do it right.

No iive seen people live in the same house and sleep in different rooms till marriage just know your limits and remember your convictions

I dont think sleeping in different rooms would be sinful.

I don’t know that I’d consider $100 a night cheap…

There’s not a reason in the world for you to stay in a hotel during your visit–infact it seems kinda dumb to me!. Your significant other and you have apparently already committed to chastity (Good for you!) Why waste your $$ on a hotel–I mean, if you are in the same town and want to have sex you certainly can–even if you are staying in a hotel, right?, Having you in a hotel is NOT going to change a thing!

My son has been in a long distance (1000+ miles) relationship for 3 years. When they see other, she sleeps in his room, he’s on the couch, or she sleeps in HER room, he’s on the couch.

Thanks for the replies guys. My gut instinct was that it was no worse than a college dorm if in separate rooms, esp. for isolated occasions, but wanted to bounce off others. It wasn’t always long distance, but job situations have put us several hours apart at the moment…one being a very rural location without friends per se yet and hotel isn’t right there.

Been there - done that. Or even with family.

If you want an added layer of protection you could ask a friend or family member to stay with the both of you as sort of a chaperone.

Do not put yourself or your loved one in a near occasion of sin.

And do not give scandal to others.

Have them stay with family or with a friend.

As St. Catherine of Siena - she will agree - seek out friends and family for them to stay with. Set the world on fire with your example here!

Yes that might require some sacrifice -but love and marriage is built on sacrifice…

That’s a real friend if they agree to go along and be a third wheel. I’ve had to chaperon before and it is really, really awkward making sure a couple observes all the proprieties. You couldn’t pay me to go along.

Do not put yourself or your loved one in a near occasion of sin.

And do not give scandal to others.

Have* them** stay* with family or with a friend.

St. Catherine of Siena - she will agree - seek out friends and family for them to stay with. Set the world on fire with your example here!

Yes that might require some sacrifice -but love and marriage is built on sacrifice…

Again, this is not possible given location.

Then go to the other location. If it is a problem for one to go one way - the other goes the other.

Find a way.

Pray to St. Catherine of Siena…

Well, I also feel it’s pretty unfair to have all of the travel fall on the same person all the time. I think the occasion of sin is no worse than being on a date alone given the precaution of separate rooms. Scandal is also nonexistent because of the short-term nature and lack of direct neighbors.

Unfair? Are you dating? (tis not a business deal -tis a matter of the heart…)

In love and dating it is unfair to travel to see ones beloved???

If it is a question of expense - that can be be paid by the other.

I was involved in a couple of long distance relationships.

Scandal is not only regarding direct neighbors …family …younger children or others who find out…persons at Church…friends etc and often one can under estimate scandal as well as near occasions of sin.

One chooses the right and prudent and good means to the good ends. That may require less than desired aspects (like staying with their family or friends) but sacrifice is part of love.

You want to arrange it so that one of you are with say a friend or family - not staying the night in the same place alone - together.

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