So what did your parents actually do right?


#1

Just wanted to accentuate the positives, since there have been some topics recently pretty much asking people to post about what their parents did wrong. I fear that this topic will wind up dead on page 2 quickly since it seems the negative, venting topics get more traffic. But hopefully some people can share some positive stories! :D


#2

[quote="ToeInTheWater, post:1, topic:221176"]
Just wanted to accentuate the positives, since there have been some topics recently pretty much asking people to post about what their parents did wrong. I fear that this topic will wind up dead on page 2 quickly since it seems the negative, venting topics get more traffic. But hopefully some people can share some positive stories! :D

[/quote]

I'd say my parents did more right than wrong. They raised me in the Catholic faith, they taught me to pray, they were actively involved in my life, supportive, and loving. They have a wonderful relationship and are a great example of a healthy marital relationship for me.


#3

They didn't kill me. :extrahappy: (yet)

In all seriousness... I'm glad my mother taught me respect and submission to parental authority even when I don't agree. (more specifically: with her methods of exercising parental authority)


#4

Lo and behold my non-Christian mother read the Gospel stories to me when I was little. I can be thankful that my mom taught me about God.


#5

[quote="Daegus, post:3, topic:221176"]
They didn't kill me. :extrahappy: (yet)

In all seriousness... I'm glad my mother taught me respect and submission to parental authority even when I don't agree. (more specifically: with her methods of exercising parental authority)

[/quote]

ME too!!!!


#6

I learn more observing them and learning from THEIR mistakes than they have ever told me in words.

I learn the best by observation. Actually, thats how Ive learned much of what I know.

I'm an observer of my surroundings, and I pick up things in a snap.


#7

Lots of things.

Fed and clothed and housed me decently, and moved half-way across the world in very difficult circumstances to give me a better life.

Made sure I got a good education (even when I was going through my rebellious 'don't want to study' phase).

Gave me a great example of a marriage between real equals and friends - nearly 50 years and still going strong.

Treated me well, let me voice my opinion and often enough listened without condescension or prejudgement.

Gave me the gift of the Catholic faith.

Gave me four sisters who I look up to and respect greatly (I'm the youngest).


#8

I should also add-- they brought me to America. And as much as I didn't like it at the time, they moved us from a somewhat ghetto-ish neighborhood to one that was halfway across the country, but I got to live in a house with a backyard and go to schools where kids weren't getting shot, or beaten up to a bloody pulp. In fact-- some of the kids at my high school dubbed the area I lived in as "the rich area.":shrug:


#9

My parents gave my siblings and I unconditional love. They stuck by us no matter what stupidity we did.

They required us to go to Mass every Sunday, even on vacation.

They worked very hard to pay for our college education.

They gave me three siblings. They supported and housed my grandmother for 30 years. I loved growing up with my grandma.

They took me to the library sometimes twice a week, even though it was a drive and there wasn't much free time. They gave us lots of freedom. We were encouraged to do lots of extracurricular activities. Our childhood was carefree.

They stayed married.

Some of the things they did wrong were extensions of the things they did right. We would have benefited from more restrictions and more consequences. I wish we had had more discussions about the practical aspects of life. But, I enjoyed many conversations with my dad on philosphical issues. And, they should have taught us the faith better, but at the time, I think they were caught up in the all the details of life and didn't give their faith its proper place. But, now, they are devout Catholics.


#10

My parents taught me about faith and love in words and actions all through their lives. They taught me to try not to judge others, they both took us to Church every Sunday and Holy Day unless we were ill, always tried to be firm but fair, put up with my teenage moods, and stayed true to their marriage vows in good times as well as bad. And then toward the end of their lives, my Dad sacrificed his own health to care for my Mom - an unbelievable example I will never forget.


#11

My pops taught me to never feel guilty about being a gentlemen. That's so important to me, to act like one. Many people (men and women) look at you funny if you open doors, pull out chairs, etc-my father told me never to let it bother you.

My mom taught me that a sense of humor is vital to survival. Without it, your in for a miserable life.


#12

They gave me life.:thumbsup: And my Catholic Faith.:thumbsup:Even though they stumbled a bit in their Faith.
They refused to put the Christmas tree up til Christmas Eve.(Guess I thought of that because it's Advent.)
They didn't speak disrespectfully of their parents, which set an example for me.
They did many things right, but not perfectly.Seeking perfection in anything outside of God is ultimately futile.Most of our parents did the best they could & we only begin to appreciate it when we become parents.Sometimes it's too late to share our appreciation because our own parents have passed on. I learned that,too, unfortunately.
Thanks for this thread. Hope there are many more posts.:)


#13

[quote="twoangels, post:2, topic:221176"]
I'd say my parents did more right than wrong. They raised me in the Catholic faith, they taught me to pray, they were actively involved in my life, supportive, and loving. They have a wonderful relationship and are a great example of a healthy marital relationship for me.

[/quote]

Me too! :)

Despite the (countless) problems I seem to more-easily find in others, this IS very nice to have a positive thread!
I am VERY grateful for my parents - they certainly aren't perfect, but they did a LOT right! :thumbsup:


#14

It's nice to have positive thread.

I would like to expand the topic a bit to include what my parents are currently doing right (coming from a husband and father of 4).

-They understand and respect our marriage and parental boundaries and do not meddle/question/criticise our family and parenting choices.

-They are supportive of our kids, frequent their activities, and in are super gracious in helping with them when we need it.

-They maintain the family unity, keeping all of my brothers and sisters families in touch and close. Family is important to them and they are still helping to instill this in their children and grandchildren.

-Provide a great example of sacrificial love...especially my father (and father-in-law).


#15

My mother gave me my faith. I still have her family Bible with her notes in it, mostly in Psalms. She was a convert herself, from a violent alcoholic home. Since she died when I was 10, I learned from other family members that she converted originally to get married to a then-boyfriend, who subsequently jilted her. She and my father found each other, he converted, and they were married. Her faith was deep and strong. It took me a while to return to it after she died (like 25 years) but I found the roots still there, waiting to flower in my own life. God had never walked away from me, and in fact He has intervened many times when I couldn't even see His handiwork until recently.

My dad taught me the value of hard work. He never said a bad word about anyone, yeah, one of those salt-of-the-earth types of men. His family has always been very close, so I learned to value family ties. Blood really is thicker...He was always the tortoise - slow and steady wins the race. He was proud. Even though we didn't have much, he always paid the bills and never took charity. He even sold his blood to pay off my mother's hospital bills after she died. His love showed through taking care of my sister and me after my mother died. He did the best he could with the tools he had.


#16

[quote="Rascalking, post:11, topic:221176"]

My mom taught me that a sense of humor is vital to survival. Without it, your in for a miserable life.

[/quote]

How could I forget to mention it! Both my parents, but Dad especially, have a fantastic sense of humour. Of course they're able to be plenty serious when the occasion calls for it, but they've taught me that the occasion calls for it a lot less often than some folk seem to think.


#17

Like many of us, it's so easy to point at the things we feel they didn't do right, but in my experience, I can tell you - even after they have both passed away - I am still learning from them... Wow...

Both had unconditional love for me and for each other.

Both were supportive in my drive to be a professional artist (which I eventually abandoned and don't regret). I was also raised in an art rich home which greatly has infiltrated how our house is today with my family.

Probably the biggest impact are the one off talks I had with my Dad and he being honest and shared his philosophical view on family and life - still teaches me things to this very day (and he's been dead for 10+years).

He was a devoted family man and husband. He put his family above anything and everything.

His lessons on work, money, integrity, respect, having a wife and kids + staying married and being a parent are lessons he passed onto me that will last a lifetime. Something happens to this day where I still reflect on his words to provide me guidance.

Among many other things, my mom certainly taught me how to cook/bake. Most importantly she was the relentless driving force in the family to focus on Catholicism.

They both taught by example (and got me involved) what's involved in taking care of elderly (grandparents). This is an extreme gift that I hope to instill in my family as well as time moves on.


#18

The best thing or right thing my parents ever did for me was that they tried to be the best parents they could be with the skills/talents/abilities that they possessed. I do post in some of the threads about parents and their short comings, because there are things I recognized that my parents just failed at, the sex talk thread especially. But I also recognize it wasn't for lack of effort on their part, they absolutely did the best they could for me and my brother. They gave us a nice home, provided for our basic needs and more, raised us in the Catholic faith, they did the best they could with what they had and what they knew.


#19

They got married young, and they stayed together for life, she died at age 70, he died at age 91. They sent five kids to Catholic school and taught us the value of hard work. (It was impossible to reach the age of 14 in my family without mom finding paid work for us to do. She was better than an employment agency.) I learned from observing them that my own happiness is not the most important thing in the world, and that brothers and sisters are better than hundreds of toys.


#20

OK, so earlier today I was scanning the thread titles in Family Life, and this is what I see:

So what did your parents actually do right? dontknow 16 230

:rotfl:

[quote="Rico_S, post:14, topic:221176"]
It's nice to have positive thread.

[/quote]

Indeed. :D Especially when I read dontknow in the right column. :p

OK, I was supposed to be aborted. After my older sister was born, the Dr. told my mom that she can never have a childbirth again because she will die (both my mom and sister had cardiac arrest when my sister was born; they both almost died). So, my mom didn't go to the Dr. for 3 months after she got pregnant with me. When the Dr. saw her, immediately wanted to schedule her for abortion. But my mom insisted, no, it's too late now. :shrug: The baby is going to kick now anytime. You can't kill a big baby like that. ;) :D


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