Something about uncommitted sex

Hello, when talking about premarital sex I never saw the following consideration:

Under ideal use the pill has a failure rate of 0.3% and condoms 2% per year[1][2]. This would mean that under ideal use of both at the same time, the failure rate per year is 0.006%.
When 1 billion women and 1 billion men are sexual active this would mean 60000 unwanted people are born that are not welcome. So 60000 lives ruined! (The mathematics: 0.006/100*1000000000 = 60000)

However, under typical use the failure rate of the pill is 9% and condom 18%[1][2]. So if used at the same time: 16200000 unwanted people!

Sex for fun is gambling with the lives of millions of people. Yes maybe you will not get pregnant, but if all people do this millions of peoples lives are ruined right from the start!


I understand what you are saying about failure rates of contraceptives - people are shocked when they don’t work but they fail quite a lot, really - but the “life ruining” bit doesn’t sit well with me. That kind of talk is usually reserved to the pro-abortion crowd. Pregnancy, delivery, and child-rearing do have their hardships, regardless of whether the pregnancy is planned or not, but most people I know who’ve had a contraceptive failure (and admitted to it, and carried the child to term) are very happy that that child came to be. Hardly a “life ruiner.”

If a billion men and a billion woman are having sex (assuming they are all straight), that doesn’t mean a billion men and each of their counterparts are even physically able to have children. Also, your numbers assume that all billion couples are using one of those two options, or both, of birth control rather than some of the other common options. It also assumes that all billion of them are trying to avoid pregnancy. If pregnancy is as common as your make it seem, then the women who are pregnant under these circumstances should be considered because they no longer can get pregnant. Your argument also assumes that an unexpected pregnancy is the same as an unwanted one.

And what I have the hardest time understanding is that… all of these hypothetical 16200000 babies have a ruined life from the start. As long as the child isn’t aborted or miscarried naturally, how is the life ruined from the start?!!

“lives ruined”.

I wonder how many of our mothers upon discovering their pregnancy with us said
“OH NO! Now my life is ruined!”

This notion that children are a huge burden is a product of the sexual revolution.
And so untrue. While there are people who really don’t love their kids, and really don’t want them, so many more are wanted, and the majority are loved no matter what the circumstances of their birth.

I am giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming that you are looking for reasons why premarital sex is not a good idea. I will agree with that premise but for totally different reasons. The reason that men and women have procreative powers is due to God’s love and mercy. In union with God, a man and a woman make a lifelong commitment to one another, a covenant. Inside of this convenental marriage, God directs us to be fruitful and multiply, which means that we are called to marriage, called to parenthood, called to raise our children to know and love God. Our family is a testament to a loving God.

Other Questions:

  1. How often during intercourse are condoms removed without one or both partners realizing it?

  2. How many people even know how to use contraception besides a condom?

I echo in agreement that contraception is a grave evil and a misleading security blanket.

Should be a good enough reason for anyone. ’

It’s a real shame it isn’t.

Beautifully said. Instead of being a sacred thing, sex has been soiled and made into a sport to be enjoyed by whoever with whoever. Sex in itself is not an awful thing, it’s what has been done to it that makes it seem perverted. It’s a disgusting obsession, and in this time, sex has become a god.

Also, I don’t personally care whether someone has a premarital relationship. It’s worse, I feel, to commit adultery. We aren’t to judge, we’re just here to live our individual lives the way we feel is right, according to our beliefs, and not tell anyone else what to do. Because, really, they should just know without having to be told.

Exactly right. I know of many kids who were unexpected but never unwanted!

Ok, maybe my formulation was not good. But this talk about, “true love waits” and “save sex for marriage” doesn’t justify why martial sex is a sin. If this person sees sex just as fun, they this person will not care about all this “true love waits” stuff. However this calculation shows that premarital sex is actually evil.

This numbers are per year. So this means everyone of this one billion people was 16,17,18,19… years old. This means that 16200000 children are born by 16 years old, 16200000 children are born by 17 years old, 16200000 children are born by 18 years old, every generation. Or even more. Almost in all this cases they see this child as catastrophic and are probably aborted.

This are ideal calculations, assuming that everyone is so careful to use both at the same time. This means that the actual numbers are much higher! A google search showed that the world has about 42 million abortions per year.

The people who have sex for fun are the source of millions of abortions.


So your argument against premarital sex is: Because God said so. Then I understand why no one cares about this.

My argument shows that even if every person used contraception in a perfect way(using pill and condoms at the same time). This would result in millions of children that are unwanted or even murdered.

42 abortions per year tell something different.

The answers to 1 and 2 are difficult to answer precisely, but it will always make the actual number higher.

It is horrible that today’s sex education leads under aged people into this false security and this results in millions of under aged parents that are pressured into abortion or children that cannot be raised in a stable family.

What I want to say is, that the liberals always claim that all this unwanted pregnancies are the result of missing education. But my calculation shows that if all teenager would use contraception in a very safe way(pill and condom at the same time), we would still have millions of teenage pregnancies world wide.

I also believe that pro choice will die in some years, just like slavery and nationals socialism. Because it is obvious murder, but people don’t want to see it’s great evil, just as they did not want to see the wrong in slavery.

When pro choice died, then my argument will make the society realize that premarital sex is evil too.

If the argument is that using contraceptives can never guarantee that one will not get pregnant, that’s absolutely correct. Every contraceptive has a failure rate even when perfectly used, and most are never perfectly used, making the failure rate higher.

The moral is: If you engage in sex, you must be prepared to be a mom or dad, regardless of what kind of contraception you use. That’s why anyone engaging in sex ought to be married to the person who will be the parent of their child.

And I agree that being pro-choice in the matter of thinking it acceptable to just kill the child is becoming more and more unacceptable.

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