There was another forum discussing burials and the high cost, which made me think about my own funeral planning. Specifically the funeral mass and which songs should be selected. I’m not sure what songs would be good and appropriate. Amazing Grace in one, but I’m looking for other suggestions. Anybody?
You may want to check with the parish you are planning to be buried out of. When I planned my mother’s funeral, they had a “funeral planning book” with readings and hymns to select from. There was a pretty wide selection, but you were expected to select from the choices in the book. If your parish has such a book then you can choose from it.
I remember picking “Hallelujah! The Strife is O’er” for Mom’s funeral as sort of an inside joke because she was very feisty and argued with quite a few people including me in her life, and more so during her last years.
Thanks! That’s a great idea. I’m a person who likes to plan things ahead of time, though I’m not planning on going anywhere anytime soon!
Amazing Grace is anti Catholic.
Many Catholic churches that sing it at Sunday Mass disagree with you.
I think he makes valid points. But if that’s what the case is I guess I am overruled.
Yeah, well, ironically enough it is “Real Catholic TV” that has lost the privilege of calling itself Catholic:
From Ned McGrath, Director of Public Affairs | Issued January 3, 2012
Subsequent to the release in mid-December, 2011, of a “Statement regarding Real Catholic TV and its name,” inquiries have come to the Archdiocesan Department of Communications regarding the timing and need for this particular declaration. The Director of Communications presents this response:
“The Archdiocese of Detroit has been consistent in its statements to and about Real Catholic TV since the fall of 2008. Due to continued requests made to the Detroit archdiocese for clarification concerning the use of the title Catholic by Real Catholic TV, and to avoid any confusion among the faithful, it was determined a public statement should make clear what has been told to Real Catholic TV, namely, that it does not have the authorization required under Church law to identify or promote itself as Catholic.”
For my own funeral plans I have chosen -
Nearer, My God, to thee
Help, Lord, the souls that thou hast made
Jerusalem My Happy Home
Be Still, My Soul
Come to Me, All ye who labour
I’ll have to talk to my kids, as I expect I will be in a position where I’ll want to have been indulgent about it.
(My husband will only care that they’re not morose.)
For my parents’ funeral, my assignment was to identify about twice as many songs and readings as they could need, and the two sent to make arrangements with Father chose from that. (The others did not mind what was chosen, so long as they didn’t have to do the choosing.)
Whoever is making your funeral arrangments will thank you very much to be clear about what you want, particularly if you want something that avoids ostentation or excessive spending. Every decision that can be taken off of the shoulders of your family will be appreciated, provided you don’t “decide” to load them down with lots of tasks to complete with too little time. (Let them know who to notify, too…)
My wife doesn’t like to think about funerals, especially hers. She hasn’t lost a parent yet to realize it’s better to plan ahead than wait until it has to be done.
Do yourself a favor. Plan yours and hers and then ask her if it is all OK with her before handing it off to whoever will be handling things.
In our state, by the way, it is helpful to sign the paperwork to decide the line of senority concerning who has control of your remains when you die. Don’t just assume your spouse won’t have been incapacitated by whatever event does you in.
If you think about how difficult and unexpected the circumstances of a death (let alone simultaneous deaths) in a family can be, you’ll know how much your family wants to know what kind of funeral you want and what kind of arrangements you want.
“I Am the Bread of Life.”
I’m considering buying myself a grave for my birthday this year. My husband does not have room in his plot for me, and in addition he is buried in a non-Catholic cemetery in his own hometown which is 2 hours away from mine. I’d like to be in my own hometown and in the Catholic cemetery, and I have no one else to make the arrangements, so I’d better get going or with my luck I’ll end up in a cardboard box on a shelf somewhere.
We considered a Catholic cemetery, but decided it was too far away, about an hour, from our parish. The Catholic cemeteries were sold by the Archdiocese of Philadelphia a while back, so they’re privately run now anyways. A veterans cemetery is even further all the way up in Washington’s Crossing. We have a local cemetery just a short distance from our church that is nicely kept. We decided to go there. That way if my wife goes first, I can visit regularly.
A side note: when we bought our burial plots, I learned my wife still had half the ashes of her first husband in a closet in our house, and her sister-in-law had the other half (mother-in-law made arrangements.) We decided to buy a niche and retrieved the other half of the ashes, combined them in an urn and put in the niche. I told her living with both husbands under one roof was a little too weird for me!
I went to a Catholic funeral of a friend last fall who had planned his own music. We had powerful solo of Ava Maria during the service–the opening song was the popular mix “Over the Rainbow/What A Wonderful World”, later on we had a Jimmy Durante version of “The Glory of Love” (you gotta give a little, take a little, let your poor heart break a little . . . ) and the closing song as they wheeled the casket down the aisle of the church was “Happy Trails To You” (the Roy Rodgers/Dale Evans standard). I still remember the priest saying to himself (probably not realizing that his mic was still on, as he escorted the casket out) “Oh this is perfect . . . just wonderful.” And he meant it (!) because I remember talking with him afterwards about what a wonderful service it was.
My mother has said that if we play “On Eagles Wings” at her funeral she’ll come back to haunt us. It was the default choice for test pilot funerals when she was in the Air Force and she dislikes the line “and he will raise you up lest you dash your foot upon a stone” associated with people who died after crashing a plane.
I prefer “I Heard the Voice of Jesus Say” but that’s mostly because I really like Vaughan Williams.https://youtu.be/6rr_4M5LQLo
“He” by Jack Richards.
IN: Requiem in aeternam
GR: Laetatus sum
AL: In exitu Israël de Aegypto
OF: De profundis clamavi ad te or Domine Iesu Christe Rex gloriae
CO: Lux aeterna
Leaving the church: Antiphon “In paradisum”.
Some of these I’ve sung at other people’s funerals so I think it fitting to have them at mine
NO Dies Irae please. I want an OF funeral Mass in Latin.
Hopefully the Gregorian schola I sing in will still be around to pull this off.
I have to admit, I really don’t like “On eagles wings.”