Speaking on annoying seating arrangements during Mass


#1

Since this is an internet message board, where the most seemingly self evident fact can be debated, I would like to present something that to me seems indefensible and see if anything can explain it to me.

In addition to my issues with non-pew scootchers, I can not for the life of me figure out why there are occasionally families with four/five/six members, whose youngest child is at least 3, sitting in the cry room. Example: two parents, two kids (let’s say ages 3 and 6) and they are all sitting in the cry. This happens all the time in our Church, where the cry room is particularly small.

It’s drives me nutso, especially when I come in there halfway through Mass and have a crying baby, or worse, a needs to nurse baby, and there are no seats.

Thoughts?


#2

I see that at my parish too, and it's mostly so the parents can let the kids run around and play during mass instead of putting the effort into keeping their children quiet and well-behaved in a regular pew. I'll see kids as old as 8 chasing each other around or playing with toys on the floor in the cry room. That is NOT what it was meant for!


#3

We were having this problem too, also we were having older people sitting back there so they could leave earlier, thus taking seats away from people with crying babies. So, our priest put signs up that say that the cry room is only for those with small children, no teenagers or older adults, thank you. It even has a big red check mark on it (he he) That really helped!


#4

Regarding non-skoochers, my husband and I always try to stay on the end of the pew because we can't take communion yet. (He is not Catholic yet and even though I am, I can't take communion until our marriage is convalidated.) So if an usher escorts latecomers to our pew, we step aside and let them take the middle so it's easier for us to stand up and wait against the wall while the others take communion.

If we skooched to the middle, other people would have to walk over us to take communion. Or we'd have to get up, walk into the aisle, then go the opposite direction through the next pew to stand against the wall (which we've done, and it's awkward, especially if another person not taking communion is kneeling in the pew and praying.)

That's just my perspective from a non-skoocher. It's not that we're rude, we just don't want to create a square dance situation during communion. :) However, our marriage should be convalidated soon and then I will be happy to skooch. (I'm a cradle Catholic who got married in a Protestant church when I considered myself Protestant, hence the need to get our marriage convalidated.)


#5

“…my issues with non-pew scootchers…”

:smiley: Hilarious.

I noticed the same upon returning to Church.

The number of times I’ve almost said, “What the heck… Move your keyster on down the pew.”


#6

somewhere in almost every church cry room is a hidden portal to hell. i just know it.

i hate those places!!!


#7

[quote="monicatholic, post:6, topic:227340"]
somewhere in almost every church cry room is a hidden portal to hell. i just know it.

i hate those places!!!

[/quote]

:rotfl: I know, right? And ours smells funny. I do not know why it seems like people purposefully choose to sit in there.


#8

I like our church cry room. :) It's near the bathroom (perfect for toilet training children), I can leave the lights out and just have the ambient light streaming in from the church. It's never crowded at the Masses we attend (granted we avoid the 9am "children's Mass" like the plague.) We never let our small children play back there. However, I too notice that adults use the cry room too on occasion. Sometimes I think it's b/c they need to be near the bathroom, but sometimes there's no clear reason. It's hard not to be put out when the reason I do go back there is so I can nurse a fussy newborn (hard to be discrete at that age), and there's 2 men sitting back there so placed that there's really no private place for me to sit. :o

Also, I've heard some people say they go back there when they're sick so they can sit apart from the rest of the congregation. :eek: A good intention gone seriously awry. :eek:
I dunno. It's not such a problem for me that I'd mention it to the priest, but I know what you mean, OP.


#9

May I suggest you come early.:slight_smile:


#10

[quote="lbishaw, post:9, topic:227340"]
May I suggest you come early.:)

[/quote]

:thumbsup: :thumbsup:

I'm always a little annoyed when people arrive late and then think they should get first-choice seating. My husband and I arrive early because I prefer to sit on the end of the pew. I am short, I live in Minnesota where the men who sit in front of me are inevitably very tall, and I have a hard time focusing on the mass if I'm not able to see the action.

We are very gracious about getting up and and allowing others to scoot THEIR late keisters into the inner pew seats. If they wanted a seat at the end of the pew, they can choose to arrive 10 minutes early like we do.


#11

[quote="lizziebits, post:1, topic:227340"]
Since this is an internet message board, where the most seemingly self evident fact can be debated, I would like to present something that to me seems indefensible and see if anything can explain it to me.

In addition to my issues with non-pew scootchers, I can not for the life of me figure out why there are occasionally families with four/five/six members, whose youngest child is at least 3, sitting in the cry room. Example: two parents, two kids (let's say ages 3 and 6) and they are all sitting in the cry. This happens all the time in our Church, where the cry room is particularly small.

It's drives me nutso, especially when I come in there halfway through Mass and have a crying baby, or worse, a needs to nurse baby, and there are no seats.

Thoughts?

[/quote]

My thought are..... hum.... well, my kids are now 5, 6 and 8, but let me tell you, IF my Church HAD a cry room, I would probably still be in it just so I could cry as loud as I want!

As a matter of fact, I almost didn't become Catholic because of the very un-family friendly atmosphere at my Church (can't go to another Catholic Church bc they are far away and I don't have a car).

If my Church had a cry room for those years when my kids were having toddler tantrums in the middle of the pews and I was there just me and 3 kids and no help, I would have been more than happy to just sit on the floor somewhere in a corner if it meant that people would stop giving me dirty looks because my 1 1/2 year old wont be quiet.

I know that they were trying to be family friendly there, but the prob. was that I had been protestant and my kids were used to going to Churches with AMAZING children's programs/ childcare/ sunday school, the works, and then all of a sudden mommy made them sit in a big room with hard seats and they had to be VERY quiet for 1 hr because they had to "pay attention" to the service (often the homilies were VERY "adult content" in nature).

So, I survived, and so can you! One day, your kids will be older, and you can be the one feeling sorry for someone else who is Catholic and has kids.


closed #12

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