I know I’m late in the game, but wanted to share anyway :).
I think that stay-at-home dads are great! I think that if a man is a SAHD, then he’s meant to be :). I know several families who do this and it works out great, but in our situation, DH told me a couple days ago (we had just visited my cousin who had a baby and her DH is a SAHD) there would be NO way that he’d seek out being at home with our children. Why? He’d go crazy! That’s not saying he’s a horrible father and lacking the nurturing part of being a parent - in fact, he’s the most wonderful father I could have ever imagined our children to have! Our son has eyes only for his daddy when he’s home. But I know DH would much rather bring home the bacon (he also LOVES his job!). I think part of it stems from the fact that he feels it’s more his role to provide and also the fact that when Matthew was younger than a year old, I left them to go do various things for a couple hours at a time, and Matthew would refuse a bottle or cup with breastmilk (I’m a breastfeeding mama) and then proceed to scream until I got home or to the point of exhaustion. So, I think he’s been slightly scarred and imagines a day to be somewhat similiar to that .
Right now, it’d probably be in our best interest if I went back to work and he stayed at home. I make a good amount more in my career than he does in his and I have more potential to make a lot more without having to further my education than he does his. However, I have no desire to go back and he has no desire to leave it - so that’s what works for us :). I will say one thing he doesn’t like is the fact that he’s had to take up a second job in order to allow me to stay at home. He appreciates any effort I make to save money or to make a little extra, but he’d never want me to go back to work. He misses the evening time he gets with Matthew, but it’s still completely worth it to him :).