I have an older step daughter who has been out of the house for a few years now. She’s 24 now. She was 14 when I came onto the scene, and during the years I was responsible for her I was not in the church, didn’t expose her to any kind of religion. Her grandmother did, although I’m not sure what and how. My stepdaughter does not believe in God and isn’t into religion at all.
When I decided last year to return to the church, she was not real happy. And she was less happy that her mother, my wife, was open to coming along. Although she never really voiced it to me, she made her feelings known to her mother.
Shortly before Christmas she was here at the house visiting and we got into an argument. It started over something between me and my younger stepdaughter, the older one decided to get into it and it didn’t end well. At the time, I thought her reaction was really weird, she was very angry over a situation that didn’t really warrant that kind of anger.
Since then we haven’t really spoken. The last month or so I’ve been trying to get her to meet with me so we can address the issue and put it behind us. She won’t answer my calls, and most of the communications is through my wife. I was told that she was willing to make up and put it behind us, etc. So over the weekend I left a message for her asking her to meet with me again.
It’s going on 3 months and imo it’s gettin ridiculous and petty.
My wife told me that after I left that message my stepdaughter called and kinda went off on her about my religion and faith and God and catholicism, etc. And my wife kinda hinted around that it’s not the first time that she’s done this. And I’m getting the picture that this whole rift is about more than the argument before Christmas, and that that argument was about more than what I thought at the time.
And I’ll add that my stepdaughter is very liberal. I think that has a lot to do with her opinion about me and catholicism, etc. And I think all that is what is creating this problem between us. I think she’s mad because of what I believe and that I don’t think like her, and that all this is a lot deeper than what it seems.
So now I don’t know what to do. She’s my stepdaughter, I helped raise her, I love her. She’s a part of our family, and a part of our lives. Except she won’t involve herself with us because of this thing between us. I’d rather have this end sooner than later so we can all get back to being a normal family. I don’t want the kid to hate me, I’d love to apologize and put this stuff behind us. But she won’t even talk to me, and it seems to me that there’s not a whole lot I can do to put an end to this.
So I’m stuck. Any suggestions?