Hello, I don’t know if this is in the right section but I need advice.
I’ve always had a problem with being afraid to show my faith. When I’m with others I can go all out but when I’m vulnerable and alone, I get so afraid. It’s usually not so much with my friends but it’s with family that really matters. It’s because you are always going to be with them. Anyway, my family and I always go with my sisters family for vacation every summer and every summer I always miss mass on the Sunday of vacation. I don’t know why I do, I feel like I need to be up to their standards and drink and do nothing with them (but I dot want to). I really desire to go to mass but I just can’t build up the courage to ask in front of them. I’m 17 so I can’t just do whatever. I don’t have my own car. It just drives me crazy because if I love God with all my heart and I’m truly obedient to his Church, why do I fear rejection and humility. Is there anyway to overcome this? I just can’t. But I feel as if I’m an adult I could because they can’t stop me or reject me then I could or if I had a religious calling or occupation one day then I could but not just how I am now.