Everyone is good at different things. Some people are better test takers than others, but it doesn’t mean that people who aren’t as good on tests are any less intelligent or competent (especially if you are doing everything you can). When you get out of school, the grades you made no longer matter, just the fact that you passed. I noticed this with classmates I had in nursing school (obviously a different profession). Some people were excellent in the skills part and comprehended the material, but they were bad at tests. It didn’t make them any worse than the rest of us who didn’t struggle with comprehending concepts better, actually while I was better at tests, a lot of them could start IV’s and do other things better than me.
I understand what it is like to struggle through school. I had no one to help me financially. I worked 60 hours a week and went to school Monday through Thursday for a year to get my nursing license and to pay my rent. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. However it was completely worth it in the end. It can be really hard to see past the struggle.
The only way I got through it was through the grace of God and His plan for me. You are actually lucky in the fact that you have a relationship with God. I was an atheist then. You have the most loving and supporting Person ever in your corner in Jesus.
You are going to be so much better having overcome the struggle than someone who had it easy. I know that sounds crazy, but it is true. Adversity has the ability to turn us into better people. That’s why God allows us to face it. And He never gives us a burden He knows we can’t carry. Things probably seem awful right now, and it is okay to feel that way. But God wants us to lean on Him when we experience things that are hard.
Pray, ask for guidance, see if there is a tutoring program to help you through the academic part. Talk to your teachers about it. Teachers don’t want their students to fail. Most importantly, talk to God. If it ends up that this isn’t your path, you aren’t failing anyone. God will lead you to where you need to be, but you have to work hard and listen.