Happy Saturday Morning. I was born into a Catholic family, but I haven't been inside the Catholic Church except for three times since age five. My mother changed religions after my father passed.
I never felt comfortable in the other churches, so as I got older I began to refuse going to church alltogether. At age forty I know very little about what it means to be Catholic. I want to learn how to be Catholic. I feel that catholic religion would be very supportive of my values of Love, Peace, and Honesty.
I've never been to confession. I've never owned a Catholic Bible. I've been to Midnight Mass once and I know there's a lot more to the Catholic Church than Sunday Mass, but I have never been a part of any of it, only because I just wasn't exposed to it after age five.
If I can learn enough about how to be Catholic then I will feel more confident about stepping into the Catholic Church on my own, as an adult. But untill then I feel like a stranger and I'm afraid to go inside.
I attempted to walk into a Cathedrial about a year ago. I just wanted to sit and pray. But the doors were locked. I felt silly. I guess I thought the doors would always be open. I remember going in once with someone when I was a teen, and we lit candles. It was in the middle of a weekday.
So, you see, I don't know what I'm doing. I'm here for guidance in living like a real Catholic; to learn the ways and the customs. Right now I'd be scared to death to walk into a confessional. I've never been in one. I wouldn't be sure how it's done. My luck I'd get inside and there would be no preist...or I'd get inside and someone else would come in and say, "Hey, I was next. I had an appointment." lol?
I have five children. My only little one is six. The others are much older. I don't even know how to get my little son involved. I don't know what activities are scheduled, what ages they're for, or if it costs money to attend.
I've lived in many places, and I've often cried tears to God, praying that I want to go home. But even when I went home I felt lost. Maybe the Catholic Church is the "home" I have been seeking for so long.
I was glad to find this forum online. I'm here for guidance and support in becoming a real Catholic, and I'm excited about this. Could this be the place where I have always belonged...in the Catholic Church? Could this be my long lost community? I almost feel like I need a "Catholic tutor" to teach me the Catholic ways. Of course, lol, I don't know if there is such a thing.
Thank you and bless you. I'm HAPPY to be here.