Teen Struggling with Sadness

During this pandemic, I’ve struggled with staying positive and not getting constantly upset. I was successful with the help of my kind mother (a social worker) for a month or two with feeling at peace with what is going on and asking God for help and being thankful, but recently my emotions have been spiraling down again. I feel guilty asking my mother for help again, because I don’t want to make her sad or become a nuisance and (on a more egotistical side) I’m afraid of seeming emotionally weak and depressed.

But I am feeling sadder and more hopeless than before. I’m losing contact with friends because I am afraid and I have been starting to fall behind in online schoolwork because I constantly feel like crying. I miss school and I miss playing in band, working with my friends on the robotics team, things that give me a purpose and satisfaction. I even can’t get my drivers license despite having everything ready and 6 hours under my belt. I feel incredibly lonely.Things that have always made me feel better (listening to my favorite songs, painting, writing my own prayers to God) haven’t been helping like they used to.

And to make this even worse, my parents won’t stop talking about moving. We’ve lived where we are since I was in 2nd grade and I love it here. I never want to move away. But with me going to college in a couple years, my parents are going to move when I leave since the taxes here are too high. I understand this, but they wont stop talking about it! Discussing where my cat will live, asking me what college I want to go to, what they need to do to our house to make it worth more, etc. I feel like if everything were normal (no coronavirus, just having a normal teen life), I would be excited and not be bothered by their discussions. But having that on top all my other emotional struggles during this time is unbearable. And when I tell my mother that these discussions bother me very much, she tells me that I am being too sensitive. Maybe this is true, but it certainly doesn’t make it any easier. I spent hours in my room crying yesterday. My parents don’t know about that.
I feel like giving up and I have no one to talk to. I don’t even have any siblings so I have no one sharing this experience. I feel incredibly lonely and sad. I’ve been praying every night asking God for help, but I don’t know what to do. I need advice.

I am sorry you are going through this, but honestly, everyone is. There is a lot of “I” in your thread. You talking about about how you feel, what you miss, and how you want or wish things could be.

I think you need to spend less time in your mind thinking about yourself, and more time thinking about others. Talk to your friends your relatives, and no, I don’t mean text. Actually talk to the people you miss by phone or FaceTime. But don’t use it it to talk negatively, use it to connect. Talk about music, or movies or whatever you have been busy with.

Get some physical exercise. Your body will feel better and you will sleep better. Work in the yard. Help a neighbor.

Do something that does not involve turning inward, only outward toward others.

4 Likes

Thank you. I think I am definitely going to do those things. God bless!

3 Likes

That’s good, but you didn’t need to delete it. It could in fact help other teens that might read it.

3 Likes

Ok. I guess I got a little nervous. Opening up can be tough for me sometimes. :slight_smile: I will repost. Thank you!

2 Likes

Hi Marshmallow,
Wow, I felt like that earlier today… I was a mess! And IrishMom’s advice is so good-- talk to people and get outside. I did that and felt like my usual self.

This is an incredibly tough time. God created us as social beings (it is not good for him to be alone) and we need to connect. And our bodies respond very well to moving around and to the out-of-doors.

One thing that was hard for me as a teenager was understanding that things would change. So often it seemed like whatever was happening would last forever. (Hmmm, now that I think of it, I’m not sure I’ve gotten over that!) Especially when we are unsure of the future, it is hard to deal with a less-than-great present.

My son’s high school has some counselors, maybe your school does too? They are probably going to be in very good shape to help students whose entire life frameworks have been ripped away. Even if you just talk with them once or twice, they may be able to give you some good advice.

2 Likes

It’s normal to feel sad when your entire routine has been upended and the whole world seems like it has gone nuts.

You’re not crazy, wrong or bad.

All of us, adults and kids, are making adjustments and it’s stressful on all of us and it won’t be all perfect and thats okay.

Don’t be afraid to go to your parents and just be aware they may have stress you don’t know about.

Please make sure you’re eating properly and enough sleep and getting outside every day for fresh air and sunshine.
Journal if you like, text and video chat your friends.

I’m sorry. Truly. Everything is so strange now :slightly_smiling_face:

2 Likes

Thank you. It truly means a lot to me! Today I successfully reached out to some friends from a while ago and went for a jog. Those things definitely helped! I have to remember, this is all part of God’s great plan. I hope you and everyone else are staying safe!

4 Likes

Thank you, I very much appreciate it! I hope you are keeping well. God bless!

1 Like

That is wonderful! I guess we just all need to learn to live in this strange new world.

1 Like

Look at you–big first steps! You got this :slight_smile:

2 Likes

@Marshmallow03, how’s it going?

1 Like

Speaking as a mom,

She wants to help you. She wants to be there for her, allow her in. Depression is not “your fault” any more than catching a cold is your fault.

There is one book I will recommend, Fr Phillipe’s “Searching For and Maintaining Peace”. You can grab it used on Amazon, or as an ebook.

Talk to your folks.

2 Likes

Also as a mom, I see being there for my kids as part of the job.

Am I sad when my kiddos are sad? Yes.
Am I big enough to take it? Yes.

Is being sad the worst thing in the world? No.
It’s all part and parcel of being in relationship to other people. We carry each other’s burdens.

1 Like
DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.