[quote="entengbarraza, post:1, topic:311440"]
almost two years ago, i tried to apply in a seminary but i failed...
i thought all the while that this feeling of mine would suddenly go away...
i even tried to bargain ideas with God that i'll try to do good in my career...pursue a master's degree....i thought all the while that was ideal.....yes, it may seem but it was not the reality at all...
i tried to ignore it...but after the being declined from my application, things got more clearer, the feeling is more enduring and stable than before.
the question is, should i try again? or is this just a test?
I'm going through a similar deal. I began application to seminary 1 1/2 years ago, with a goal of leaving university after my sophomore year to enter seminary last fall. However, I got refused. Although he didn't say I would never be accepted (it was more along the lines of, "you need to do these things before we accept you") I still felt quite rejected and wondered whether I had a calling or not.
Now, almost exactly 13 months after being told that, overall, the feeling has grown stronger and I have continued to feel that I will not be at peace inside until I have given seminary a try. To me, this means that I am still being called at least to seminary.
If you are still feeling called, by all means, take this up with a spiritual director, or even the vocations director again, and tell him what you're going through. If you're still refused, first of all, make sure you ask why you were refused. Next of all, being refused again may mean that you are not called to be a priest, at least in that particular diocese. If could possibly mean that 1) you are called in another diocese, 2) you are called to join a religious order or something, OR, 3) you are mistaking a simple call to growth in your relationship with God for a call to the priesthood. (3) is something I've wondered about for myself, because, although I wasn't bad or extremely immoral before I first experienced a calling, I was not very close to God.
It very well could have been a test. So, again, I would advise you to go through with applying again, but I strongly recommend you talk it out with someone, perhaps the vocations director himself to find out why you weren't accepted the first time. In the meantime, continue to pray to know and accept God's will for your vocation, even if it isn't what you are expecting. Adoration is always a big help, if you don't already do that.
You'll be in my prayers!