The "CALL" is enduring this time


#1

almost two years ago, i tried to apply in a seminary but i failed…

i thought all the while that this feeling of mine would suddenly go away…

i even tried to bargain ideas with God that i’ll try to do good in my career…pursue a master’s degree…i thought all the while that was ideal…yes, it may seem but it was not the reality at all…

i tried to ignore it…but after the being declined from my application, things got more clearer, the feeling is more enduring and stable than before.

the question is, should i try again? or is this just a test?


#2

I wanted to be a priest ever since I was in Kindergarden. I loved the idea of what a priest was and the idea of being a priest was very appealing to me (as I came to understood more and more of what it was).

I went to a weekend retreat at a seminary offering us to come and experience life there.

After letting us hang around for a couple days....going to little classes and such....we were to meet with a couple priests their privatly to talk about where we were in our vocation search and to talk about our spiritual life.

I went to this seminary retreat thinking that I had "arrived" and was a perfect candidate and how I was ready to sign up etc etc...................................I got cut up one side and down the other when I went to my meetings with the priests. "You need to work on this" "you need to practice that" "this concerns us here" "you seems strong her but weak there "

My life was flipped upside down..... I didn't understand

I'll never forget that night. I woke up in the middle of the night and snuck down into the chapel.........It was pitch black everwhere....when I fumbled into the chapel....there was one light illuminating this huge tabernacle (it was like something out of a movie). I went to my knees on the floor before the tabernacle and said "why did you bring me here! I don't understand! I thought for years you wanted for me to be a priest!" .... I kid you not.... I heard Gods voice......I can't explain it! The best way I could explain is like I heard a statement............very clear, very direct and peaceful....but I didn't hear it audibly....I "heard" it in my mind. I KNEW it was NOT myself............He said " I did not bring you here to make you a priest, I brought you here to grow"

Now....in my pride I thought that meant that I was still gonna be a priest....I just needed to work on some things.

Everything began to slowly change from there and I slowly began to realize that one of my best girl friends was someone I could not live without...........Later got married and we have a son and are known to have a very strong catholic family.

My point ?

I can tell you this....EVERYTHING happens for a reason! Declinations, callings, movements, job positions and what they teach you, etc etc...........all VERY significant because God usues moments in our life to speak with us.

Keep praying and working on your spiritual life. Sometimes (as it was in my case) ....God calls to people to simply bring them into a deeper relationship with Himself and work on your holiness.

God is in charge and if he wants you as a priest/religious .....you WILL become one. Don't be afraid of being declined ....it's happening for a reason. You may need more time, you may need to work on something, it may not be the right time in Gods plan for you to enter just yet etc etc. You hear of stories of many saints that were told to wait before they entered.

It's going to be ok.

U need to place your wants and needs in this instance aside and really pray and work on understand what GOD WANTS. That should get rid of your feelings about all of this ....be pleased that your openess is permitting God to work.

I highly suggest regular time at confession and going to pray before eucharistic adoration/ or before the tabernacle. Also, if you know of any priest that you can confide in....go speak with them about these things.

God bless and good luck!


#3

If you still feel that you are being called to the priesthood then of course you must try again. Sometimes our lives and the path that God is choosing for us are not easy to discern, but we must try to follow what we think we are hearing. In the process of discernment you will have many opportunities to reflect and listen to how others feel about your ability to become a priest, even when it is hard listen closely with an open heart and mind. God bless with the ability to hear His call.


#4

[quote="entengbarraza, post:1, topic:311440"]
almost two years ago, i tried to apply in a seminary but i failed...

i thought all the while that this feeling of mine would suddenly go away...

i even tried to bargain ideas with God that i'll try to do good in my career...pursue a master's degree....i thought all the while that was ideal.....yes, it may seem but it was not the reality at all...

i tried to ignore it...but after the being declined from my application, things got more clearer, the feeling is more enduring and stable than before.

the question is, should i try again? or is this just a test?

[/quote]

I'm going through a similar deal. I began application to seminary 1 1/2 years ago, with a goal of leaving university after my sophomore year to enter seminary last fall. However, I got refused. Although he didn't say I would never be accepted (it was more along the lines of, "you need to do these things before we accept you") I still felt quite rejected and wondered whether I had a calling or not.

Now, almost exactly 13 months after being told that, overall, the feeling has grown stronger and I have continued to feel that I will not be at peace inside until I have given seminary a try. To me, this means that I am still being called at least to seminary.

If you are still feeling called, by all means, take this up with a spiritual director, or even the vocations director again, and tell him what you're going through. If you're still refused, first of all, make sure you ask why you were refused. Next of all, being refused again may mean that you are not called to be a priest, at least in that particular diocese. If could possibly mean that 1) you are called in another diocese, 2) you are called to join a religious order or something, OR, 3) you are mistaking a simple call to growth in your relationship with God for a call to the priesthood. (3) is something I've wondered about for myself, because, although I wasn't bad or extremely immoral before I first experienced a calling, I was not very close to God.

It very well could have been a test. So, again, I would advise you to go through with applying again, but I strongly recommend you talk it out with someone, perhaps the vocations director himself to find out why you weren't accepted the first time. In the meantime, continue to pray to know and accept God's will for your vocation, even if it isn't what you are expecting. Adoration is always a big help, if you don't already do that.

You'll be in my prayers!


#5

Wow. :eek: I know I’ve felt this as well in my search. Thank you for this wonderful post. :clapping:


#6

thanks:o


#7

[quote="entengbarraza, post:1, topic:311440"]

the question is, should i try again? or is this just a test?

[/quote]

Only god knows the answer to that question with certainty.

You can but try your best to discern his answer.

you need to ask yourself. What reason(s) were given for the refusal. Some things may make you permanently unsuited to the Ordained Life. Others may make you suited to a different ordained or religious vocation than the one you applied for.

Of course you should consider trying again. but only after asking and why you were rejected and have those reasons been tackled.


#8

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