The calling waxes and wanes, but each swell is stronger than the last. I know my path, and I walk happily down it, even if I do stumble now and again. I sing praises as roses are sent from heaven, and I’m able to bear up under the rain so far. I have so much to be thankful for, and my fears seem silly in the face of all that God has done.
Am I worthy?
No. Only one birthed of woman was ever worthy, and we killed him. He got better.
What about my sins? My pride, my stubborn foolishness?
God gives us the bishops, He gives us our brothers, our sisters. Even the saints. When I fall - and I will fall - from the path, I will have my Francis to remind me “All I know, and all I need to know, is that these hands bring me Jesus.”
What if I am to have a wife? How will I support a family?
Well, you aren’t really seeking, are you? And if God blesses you with a family, they will be fed as the birds of the field, and clothed as the lilies.
What if it is all a mistake? What if it is just my pride?
We all make mistakes. God will be there on the walk, and He will guide you where you should go. There are many guides on the path. Trust them, and trust God.
My brothers and sisters, my elders, my juniors, pray for me please. I feel the swelling of the Spirit within me. I feel strengthened, made strong again, and I know that the trials are ahead. I thank you all for walking with me when our paths converge. I’m blessed by places like this.