The morality of a working mom and stay at home dad


#1

If the wife is a doctor and the husband has a low paying job he doesn’t like, do you think it would be morally ok for the wife to be a working mom and the husband to be a stay at home dad if they were to have kids? This is assuming they both agreed on that together and both like the idea.

I think it would be ok, of course, but am curious to see how prevalent this opinion is amongst Catholics.


#2

Some families have stay-at-home moms, and no one questions the morality of that. A stay-at-home dad isn’t any different.

I believe that, when possible, both parents should be working, but if a married couple decides that it would be best for one parent to stay home with the kids, then it doesn’t really matter which parent that is (but it would typically make more sense for the person with the higher income to keep working in order to best provide for the family).


#3

Any particular reason you think both parents should be working outside the home, even if finances are not a concern?


#4

agreed


#5

I, personally, could not handle such a situation at all. But that’s why I am who I am and married who I did :smiley:

However, just because something seems completely abhorrent to me doesn’t automatically mean it isn’t perfectly wonderful - not to mention morally fine - for someone else.

After all, I also adore snakes and have no trouble handling them (with appropriate safety considerations) - something that many others find completely baffling. :shrug:

God created us all differently, I guess.


#6

I didn’t vote because this isn’t a morality issue. Frankly, it is none of anyone’s business which parent works, which parent stays at home etc and so on. For the most part, men generally work with women staying at home. Each family is different and may have different circumstances and no one should be judging what others are doing with work, children and staying at home.


#7

agreed


#8

I am a stay at home dad who homeschools our children. We have four, soon to be 5. I have done so for 9 years and I love it.


#9

Cool! What does your wife do?


#10

the morality is not the issue; the spouses and their attitudes are; it is important that one side not feel more important than the other, that there be no destructive criticisms or petty jealousies. So with loving maturity, any combination can work for a family and the children will benefit by the loving arrangement.


#11

Per se, it is not a moral issue apart for some catholic persons like on the blog fix the family (fixthefamily.com/). This " catholic " is out of the norm. His view is “crazy” and co.


#12

I’m curious as to why you think both partners should always work. It’s not the norm now, but some people still feel that having one person at home to run the house and handle life’s daily chores makes their life go more smoothly. There are many charities that would not survive if it were not for the stay-at-homes who are their lifeblood.


#13

Id like to hear from the person who voted “no, it would not be morally ok”, so if they could please come forward and explain their reasoning, it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

Also, someone voted my thread as a one star “terrible”. Whats wrong with my thread? This makes me sad. :frowning:


#14

Oh yes, i’ve heard about him…


#15

What is important is that the children grow up knowing they are loved, encouraged and supported. This is the job of BOTH parents- to provide a home filled with love. It makes no difference whether the mother and/or the father works outside of the home. In my daughter’s home, she is the main breadwinner while her husband stays home with their very young son. While not for everyone, it is certainly working out well for their family! They were recently featured on their local news in a segment about stay at home dads- and the news provided statistics about this growing trend. Her husband finds it very fulfilling- and plans fun and learning activities for the baby’s day, and my daughter finds her profession rewarding, especially because she doesn’t worry about the baby! He’s with his dad, receiving love and attention. I suspect that, when the baby is older, my son-in-law will return to work…but for now, everyone is happy and their home is filled with laughter and love.


#16

What doesn’t she do! She is a scientist for a large biotech company. She is very smart and makes decent money. She also is getting her MBA in December. She is carrying our fifth child!

When we started having children we decided that one parent needed to stay home. That was important to us. So, we looked at future earning potential and decided she should work. We did not know at that time that we would homeschool but as it turns out that is also a decision we made. I would not change either decision. My children are incredibly healthy, and happy and well behaved. Their childhood is something anyone would envy.


#17

It could be the same person who is just stirring up trouble. :o

As a Trial Member, can you rate threads? If so, you could vote it a 5 star thread, which would bring up the average and make in 3 stars. :slight_smile:


#18

Yes, I could… but I didnt. But it looks like 2 people gave me a 5 after seeing my post! Haha, that is so sweet!

Thanks guys, whoever you are! :smiley:


#19

Thats amazing! Congrats on the new baby.


#20

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