Ever since I was a little kid, I have always had absolutely no desire in ever getting married. Sure, one is to stay open to marriage, but I’m definitely not going to look for a girlfriend. I’m perfectly content being single and I’m glad I don’t feel called to marriage.
This brings us to my question: is it okay to take anaphrodisiacs to decrease libido? Licorice, something called a Chaste Berry, and other things can decrease libido, which I would love to take because I absolutely hate lust and find attraction really annoying.
That’s the problem. Before I was a Catholic I used to look at immoral images and also suffered from a fetish (I believe I suffered from the fetish since I was probably a toddler.) While I no longer look at such images, I cannot stop seeing young women as objects and I can’t stop being aroused when I have to talk to them. The fetish, on the other hand, seems impossible to stop and I was probably born with it or I acquired it when I was a very young age which probably stemmed from misunderstandings of certain states women can be in.
It seems far easier to stop lustful thoughts directed at young women than it is to stop arousal due to the fetish. Even some prayers or rather innocent words can trigger the fetish if I am not careful. :eek:
As I am not interested in getting married, I personally don’t see why it would be bad to take Chaste Tree Berry. After all, God put it on Earth for a reason. :shrug:
You have to examine this bolded statement. Getting herbal medicine from your tribe’s medicine man is not the same thing as going to GNC to buy a bottle of who knows what. Medicine man knows what he is doing with a person who has a “natural diet” and a “natural lifestyle”. Do you have a natural diet and a natural lifestyle, or is your body full of preservatives, and do you do a lot of sitting all day long? I hope you see what i’m getting at here.
This would be something to seek counseling for. It may be that such a option could be part of a treatment plan, but I would strongly recommend getting the advice of a professional rather than self-medicating, which can have many unintended and possibly dangerous side effects, and in addition may not solve the underlying issue.
You need counseling, STAT. You have expressed scrupulous tendencies here, have anger management issues, and now describe some psycho-sexual issues.
Certainly, you are not in a position to date currently, but avoiding women, marriage, and natural desires are not going to solve your problem. So, no, don’t try to home remedy this situation through whatever things you’ve read on the internet.
Some long term therapy is likely in order, and the outcome could very well be a well adjusted person with the ability to form a lifelong partnership in marriage. Or the outcome might be a well adjusted person who is called to remain single.
But right now, you need help with serious issues in your life.
During the early years of the Church devout men would castrate themselves to control these thoughts/desires. In response to that practice the Church prohibited the procedure. Maybe the great thinkers of the day felt that resisting temptation made one stronger…I dunno, but they had their reasons.
I’m sorry, but I disagree. I feel people often misunderstand me online. I do not have anger issues per-se. I lose my temper most often when I am over-tired. Who doesn’t get frustrated when they run into issues when they are awake over 16 hours? :shrug:
People in the real world view me as a very friendly person who is very innocent.
I do not think I am particularly scrupulous either, rather, I am confused. I am confused because I need to ask Father more questions in regards to sin. I’ve been asking the various Priests I see in confession about sins I am confused about and they have been very helpful.
I don’t believe I suffer from “Psycho-Sexual” issues. I have an easy time stopping lust for the most part, but I have trouble stopping attraction and arousal.
I don’t feel called to marriage. I don’t think I need a priest to tell me what I know in my heart.
I’m perfectly happy. I don’t need to see a counselor.
You’re definitely scrupulous, and I think sometimes you miss the “big picture” when it comes to discerning sin. Like, you don’t need to ask about each individual, unique action. Once you understand what sin is, how it damages our relationship with God, and how to differentiate between venial and mortal, you can pretty reliably figure this stuff out for yourself, at least for the day to day stuff.
As far as having psycho-sexual issues, eh…maybe, maybe not. Certainly it’s not weird for a young man to be physically attracted to women. As far as the “fetish”…well, that depends on what it is, I suppose. If it’s something like, “I’m aroused by pictures of women in bikinis or lingerie.” then, yeah. Join the club. That’s a very common thing and not at all indicative of a warped sexuality. If it’s something like, “I fantasize about hurting women and am aroused by seeing them abused or in pain” then yeah, you need to talk to a counselor immediately.
You do seem to struggle with social interaction. I’m not saying you’re not a nice person, but you do seem to struggle with reading people and not hyper analyzing social interactions. Maybe that’s the source of your disinterest in marriage? If that’s the case, a counselor to help you work through this stuff couldn’t hurt.
I give chaste tree berries to horses with cushings disease . This disease is caused by a tumour in the pituitary gland. Horses are either on a drug permanently, or the berry, until the disease is causing problems.
The issue with both these treatments- the drug or the berry, is neither can be stopped, or the dose reduced instantly. Massive side effects then occur. Even giving the medication out of a routine time causes side effects.
Side effects also occur initially. The biggest being vertigo and depression. Yes in horses.
So there is no way I would suggest a human self medicate with chaste tree berries, ever.
I agree with 1ke. You have issues. Please consult a professional .
I am not sure I understand how you arrived at this conclusion. What you thought “as a little kid” probably means not much. But as a more mature person you should be able to more clearly describe your feelings and inclinations.
You experience attraction to women, so – what are the factors that repel you from the idea of marriage?
I have quite a few reasons I don’t want to get married. I want to be free to do what I want when I want it. I don’t want to have to deal with a nagging wife. I think that oral sex and anal sex are vile beyond description. I don’t want to be romantic or flirt, that’s gross. I want to be able to decorate my house however I want it. I want to be able to buy or sell whatever I want to. I know that I would get into many arguments with the theoretical wife which would probably lead to an annulment. I know marriage isn’t for me. It just isn’t comparable with my personality. And besides, sex is pretty disgusting if you really think about it.