Hello! Peace be with you!
All things have an essence, a nature, as well as defining characteristics, right? A dogs essence is “doginess”, a tables essence is “tableness” and its characteristics are its shape, dimensions, purpose etc. We call the essence of living things “nature”. The Church maintains the idea of human nature as being fixed and dynamic. When an egg is fertilized, what is its nature? It’s physical characteristics may be unrecognisable as human (although even that’s moot) but its nature MUST BE human. The physical manifestations will change but the nature- the essence of that embryo’s being will not. It is a human being from the first instance of fertilization. That human being is at its most vulnerable then, at its most dependant on your/ our understanding of its needs, of its right to life.
I will pray for you my brother. Remember prayer is often not about God performing some function we want or feel we need, but about our accepting the reality of our lives with grace. We all bear crosses, just as Christ Jesus did.
God bless you and keep you and the Holy Spirit be with you and comfort now and always,