I have been thinking about leaving the Church. I worked for my local Diocese for the last two years and have ran across some of the most un-christian type behavior I could ever describe. I know that the Church is made up of fallible individuals but I can’t describe how discouraging it is to be in contact on a daily basis with people who represent the Church yet act in terrible ways. I was lied to, deceived by and gossiped about by people who supposedly are carrying out Christ’s mission here on earth. As a matter of fact on my first day at work at the Diocese a long term employee told me that " you’ll lose your faith working here". She unfortunately was right.
I , like most of the people on this Forum, had a deep appreciation for the Catholic Church. I was the type of person who read and studied Church History, read every Papal Encyclical and had a genuine appreciation for our faith. I took the job working for our Diocese not for the money ,which was modest, but to serve a higher calling. Now all I feel is betrayed and confused. I have left the job and have found a position with a wonderful company and many of my former fellow workers have also left. The one overriding factor for all of us was the hypocrisy of the leadership and the terrible way they treated their employees.
I know that it does me harm to harbor bitterness but trust me, I’ve seen things from inside the Church that would discourage the strongest Catholic. From the Bishops on down we have serious problems in the way we treat people and the “coldness” of our hearts.
How does one get past this type of terrible experience and learn to see the beauty of the Church again?
Thank you and God Bless