This article makes me angry


#1

A friend posted this on Facebook. I can’t believe that a Catholic wrote this and is using the Church to defend the idea that women shouldn’t go to college. I don’t find the Catholic church to be oppressive in the least, but I sure as heck hope that most Catholics don’t feel this way about women recieving a college education.

fixthefamily.com/blog/6-reasons-to-not-send-your-daughter-to-college


#2

Let’s face it. The Muslim religion has a cultural history spreading back eons.Their view of the place of women in society should be respected. We should also respect the authors of this article. There understanding of the weakness of will found in most women leave us very little choice but to protect them against their baser nature. Thus the emphasis on the occasion of sin. I lock my wife up every full moon just in case.
This is what comes from reading too much garbage on the internet. You know the teaching of the Church on the dignity of man and woman. We are equal partners in the eye of God. Just trash it.


#3

The article doesn’t make me angry, but I wouldn’t say I agree with it. I know plenty of people that don’t fit the descriptions in this article. If I remember my high school math correctly, all I need to prove a theory false is ONE counterexample.

I can give more than 10 from my family and closest friends.

I believe they raise several good points that should not be dismissed so readily, but they should accepted lightly either. College is a decision that everyone, male and female, should consider carefully and seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit.


#4

I totally agree with you–what a crock! I’ve never heard of this group or person before and I won’t be reading anything more from them in the future either.Frankly, it’s a shame that someone with ideas like this aligns himself with the Catholic church–his absolute ignorance reflects on Catholics and I dare say that 99% of Catholics whether lay or priest, man or woman, college educated and working or stay at home, would be offended at such b.s. Just remember that every religion has a few flakes in it—and you just found one.


#5

I think they bring up some very good points, one of which may be bing played out in the case of one of my relatives :frowning:

I think that in this day of rising college costs that everyone should consder whether or not a student should go on to college, or how much college one should strive for, and the purpose of that education. Does *everyone *need to get into white-collar work in which a degree is a prerequisite? No. How many people go to college and study something fun or interesting, only to need to get an Associate’s in something useful in order to be able to get a job?

The issues about colllege debt are real. I have heard of people delaying marriage because of it, and not getting married until their 30s. This is not a good thing either–even St Paul talked about marrying in order to avoid temptation.

I think they should not have said people *shouldn’t *send their daughters to college, but that families should really consider what the student, male or female, should do to attain what is best for him or her. There are young peoplle out there getting training in the trades and starting their own businesses and ending up in financially better shape than those who study education or social work for 6 years.

Not that everything is about money, but the problem is that college puts unrealistic expectations on what one will do afterwards.


#6

I completely agree that there is a strong need to reevaluate our society’s focus that every person should be guided into a 4 year degree program. But I don’t want to go off on a tangent and hijack this thread.

My thoughts on the article are this - I met my wife at college, we will have been married for just shy of 3 years when we are expecting our first, and my wife has worked at jobs requiring college degrees since she graduated. Not sure about work after the baby, but we will decide that as a family. The other example is my sister-in-law, expecting her 7th in December. Went to college, graduated, worked for several years, and then met my brother. Now she uses her knowledge to teach her kids at a preschool level before they start kindergarten.


#7

I completely agree that there is a strong need to reevaluate our society’s focus that every person should be guided into a 4 year degree program. But I don’t want to go off on a tangent and hijack this thread.

My thoughts on the article are this - I met my wife at college, we will have been married for just shy of 3 years when we are expecting our first, and my wife has worked at jobs requiring college degrees since she graduated. Not sure about work after the baby, but we will decide that as a family. The other example is my sister-in-law, expecting her 7th in December. Went to college, graduated, worked for several years, and then met my brother. Now she uses her knowledge to teach her kids at a preschool level before they start kindergarten.


#8

I completely agree with you that college isn’t and shouldn’t be pushed on every kid as some kind of ultimate expectation or goal. I have 5 grown kids and when I was raising them, if you didn’t lay a guilt trip and serious fear-of-the-lord on a kid that said kid must go on to college, you weren’t parenting right. Of my 5 kids, 3 went to college and 2 did not. One of the two “did-nots” is my son who is a plumber and pipe fitter and who makes more money than some engineers and more than one of my college educated other kids. Go figure!

What is wrong about the article is the assumption that higher education is somewhat inappropriate for girls–but an expectation for boys. The author seems to assume that girls are a class of slightly ignorant wall flowers whose job it is to remain barefoot and pregnant and at home serving their man and 15 kids because to attend college or to work puts them at risk to succumb to sin that they, by their very nature, are far too simple-minded and weak to resist. He assumes that women are just so delicate that they mustn’t be trusted to retain their purity if you don’t keep them under lock and key. I think this guy should convert and consider being a Shiite muslim as his beliefs really go right down that line of thinking!

I’m a nurse practitioner. My husband and I have 5 kids as I said above. I have always worked and always made more money than my husband who works construction. He has never felt castrated and he actually works harder physically and has longer hours than I do. My education in no way caused him to set at home on his butt and play video games, If he had, he would no longer be my husband because I wouldn’t tolerate it and he knows it! When he was out of work–as happens from time to time in the construction industry—he looked for his next job and while he was out of work, he cooked, cleaned house, ran car pool and so on, and was supportive to me and very glad that my salary paid the rent and bought food. What my education did do–in a world where it’s hard to support even the customary 2.5 kids without falling below the poverty line, was to allow us to have, raise and enjoy our 5 children–a large family in this day and age-- and to support them without being on welfare!

The man who wrote this article is, I.M.H.O., an absolute, total, 100% male, chauvinist pig and an utter fool who is an embarassment if he proclaims himself a Catholic and parades his opinion as based on sound Catholic principlesl! Believe me, I’m no feminist–but I can recognize a crock when I see, hear or read it!!!:banghead:


#9

I don’t think the original article was meant to be serious.

I agree with this, and I won’t elaborate and hijack the thread.


#10

“Good grief,” is what I first thought when I read that article. What planet is this guy living on?

However, buried in the article are a couple or so points that should be applied to ALL kids going to college: the cost (which is spiraling out of control. Student debt is huge.) and the usefulness of what they study. There are graduates now just working at Starbucks or Kmart to make ends meet and that’s not to mention those who actually studied for a useful career.

But his stance that you shouldn’t encourage your daughter to attend college (and the reasons he gives) just isn’t realistic. My mom graduated university back in the late '30s and it never had the ill-effects this guy seems to think it will.


#11

My two daughters went to college, one to grad school. My son did’t go to college and works in a trade. My eldest daughter, with the MA owns her own business. She makes much more money than her husband who works from home. Their first child is due this winter. She will go back to work three days a week. In the area where they live two incomes are necessary.

A degree I believe is good for any woman even if staying home. Once the kids get older mom will have skills to work in more than a menial job. It is much harder to start to go back to school later. I got my BS at 22, got married and had kids before going back to work once the kids were in school full time, and was able to go back for advanced degrees. Now my husband had to retire early and I am able to support us.

I will echo one of the comments on that blog…is this guy for real?


#12

It occurs to me that the same arguments could equally be applied to men: :rolleyes:

He will attract the wrong kind of women - especially those gold diggers looking do bag a rich doctor or lawyer-to be! So what normally happens with this set up is that those lazy women who are looking for a father-figure in a husband are very attracted to this responsible, organized, smart man who has it all together along with a steady paying job with benefits. So if she wants to go to work he can, but if not she can always fall back on his income.

He will be in a near occasion of sin - once he becomes sexually active with her, she releases hormones that mask her faults, and he remains in a dreamy state about her. Before marriage she should be very sensitive to the complete reality of the woman she will enter into a lifetime commitment with. It is one thing to advise our son of this reality in ordinary situations, but placing him into an environment that will tempt him to lose this barrier is unfair to him.

He will not learn to be a husband and father - household and family relationships require much more than just earning an income- these abilities cannot be learned in any college.

The cost of a degree is becoming more difficult to recoup. It makes much more sense for a young couple to have a wife with a skill that has reasonable compensation to go along with it and a husband who is willing to be frugal especially during the early years of starting their family. Or indeed, a joint income…

You don’t have to prove anything to the world. Often the reason for a boy going to college is the pressure of the society around him, including his parents. The society is so fixated with the masculine ideal of men having to have a job and provide an income to have worth.

It could be a near occasion of sin for the parents. In our culture many parents feel an unnecessary obligation to pay for the children’s college tuition. So parents may avoid having more children with contraception, sterilization, or illicit use of NFP to bear this cost. To assume that all of our children will need a college degree is quite a stretch, particularly for boys who will likely be fathers.

He will regret it. The more we talk about this prudent option for boys, the more we have men who are willing to admit to the regret they possess for having bought into the lie of the dual-career family.


closed #13

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.