This is just crazy


What do you do when a girl tells you, whom you haven’t even dated yet, that she wants 1 kid? Then she asked you what your income is. I’m like, I’m not telling you that, we just met. Then asks you are you willing to move and I’m like, WHAT? We haven’t even dated yet and you’re asking me if I want to move?! What do you all think?



Obviously a) she sees plenty of future potential in you, which you should be flattered by, and

b) she sounds desperate and crazy as a loon and you should run a mile before staying to find out whether she actually is either of these things or not. :smiley:


LOL … yep, run Nick… no! don’t look back! just run!
The right woman is out there for you! I know it might sound trite, but it is true!!! May God Bless you!!! :yup:


Marriageable men are kind of rare out there, above a given age, so a girl might assume a man is afraid of having more than one child and say that so as not to scare him off. However, the “income question” is a dead giveaway. Back in my “courting days” that would have been the end of the road, with no other information necessary. My friend, there are so many wonderful Catholic girls out there (I have a 27 year old son, just out of professional school, so I know) many of whom have very big doubts whether they will ever meet “Mr. Right”, that you don’t need to waste your time on the doubtful ones. Your job, my man, is to make yourself “Mr. Right”. Do that, and you’ll not face a shortage of women who would make wonderful wives.


Oh Nick…RUN…and RUN FAST…can you say GOLD DIGGER…??? :eek:


:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:Yeah, you’re right. This incident that I describe happened 6 months ago.

Yes, I agree. This was a long time ago. I drove her off. Right now we’re just friends.

Here’s what she said to me recently though.

"Happy 29th Birthday to you! Hope that you have a
great day. I continue to pray for you as I hope that
you do for me.

I’m soon to be 24 (on January 1st)

Here’s to 2007 being the year that the both of us find
true happiness."

Here’s what I said,

Then said to me,
“everyting ok?”



well that was very nice of her…

what was her response ot this last part?
maybe she expected you to say something more than thanks?


I didn’t say that to her, but that’s what I was thinking.


Bones I am shocked:D …you, who like to speak your mind thought something but did not speak it :eek: can it be???


What do you mean by this? I’m not following here.


Sorry Bones…

Your last sentence was To which I was like WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!

So I said what did she say when you said this to her…you said I didn’t say that to her, but that’s what I was thinking
So I in turn said…Bones I am shocked:D …you, who like to speak your mind thought something but did not speak it :eek: can it be???
Do you follow now? If not dont worry…it was not an insult just teasing you a bit;)



I actually said, in response to “everything ok.”

“Yep. Yourself?”

She said, “yeah…i was wondering as you wrote back only thanks for the birthday e-mail and that isn’t like you.”

Karin she’s freaking me out.


Bones I am gonna PM ya’


First off, sounds like this girl is kind of crazy ;).

Secondly, it made me laugh :D. I asked my husband during our first long phone conversation those same things, but way more subtly. Plus, we had been hanging out as friends for a while, just no serious conversations yet…then he called me. And we talked for an hour and a half about many things including these. My questions were more along the lines of “Where do you want to live when you graduate?” “What are your plans career-wise?” “How many children do you want to have when you get married?”

Maybe they weren’t so subtle…lol. But then again, he was really interested in dating me at the time - so he answered them and got all checks in my book ;). He said he could live anywhere (I’m from Chicago, he was from OH) and have as many children as God blessed him with (another plus plus!) and he wanted to be a teacher but get his phD eventually so he could teach at the college level (he can provide for a family!). There we have it :D.


Nick, one word: Psycho

Don’t call her, don’t date her, try not to even see her out. That’s crazy behavior and you don’t want to go there.


OK, let me reinforce part of my response to your OP…

don’t have contact with her-- it fuels her fantasy that “someday” you might want more. I’m serious, this girl is psycho.

I can hear her mental conversation, or her actual conversations with her girlfriends… it goes something like this:

“Well, he wouldn’t email me if he didn’t like me… Do you think he likes me?.. Yeah, well, I don’t know, he gives little hints like he likes me…”

Honestly, she will turn any little crumb into something in her head. I promise you, cutting her out completely is probably the only way you’ll achieve sanity.


Happy Birthday! My birthday was the day after yours :slight_smile:

1ke is right. I had a friend who acted just like that and she drove me crazy! She was always talking about the poor guy. And the guy was very nice (and a good Catholic) and didn’t have the heart to run when he could. It turned out really, really ugly in the end, and I even had to cut her out of *my *life (I moved out of state in the middle of this, so that helped). She would call me and talk about the poor guy for hours. She would talk about interactions that happened over a year ago, and they were tiny little crumbs like 1ke said. I wouldn’t worry about hurting her feelings–if you don’t plan on having a relationship with her it will be even worse in the long run. Maybe you could change your e-mail address :wink: Hey, maybe you can tell her that you’re discerning a religious vocation! Would that be far from the truth?


Hmm…if you want to be kind to her friends, and save their sanity, cut off contact, but let her know in no uncertain terms that you are doing so. I’m the friend of an overanalytical woman. She has gotten better over the years (aided with some anti-anxiety drugs) but holy cow, sometimes the conversations had me banging my head against whatever was closest.
“Why hasn’t he called me? I left five messages!”
“Hon, perhaps you should just let it go.”
“No, I need to know what’s going on. Maybe I did something wrong? Why won’t he text message me?”
"(sigh) Perhaps he got tied up at work. It happens to you sometimes."
"I know, but you’d think he would take five minutes to at least return my emails! He was all flirty with me the last time I saw him. That means he likes me, right?“
And then I would consider contacting the guy myself to tell him to grow a spine and tell her that he’s not interested and to leave him alone. But of course I never did this, he never worked up the guts on his own to actually confront her, and so I would be the one on the phone for hours trying to talk sense into my friend.
“He didn’t say he wasn’t interested, so maybe he still is, right? He said I looked nice. Maybe I should call him again. I sent him a card to let him know I was thinking of him. Do you think I should cook dinner and take it to his house?”
”(sigh) :banghead: "

Please, for all the women like me out there, tell her you’re not interested. Tell her in such a manner that there is no room for debate. Then change your email address. And if you’ve given her your work email or some other one you can’t change, well, you’ve learned your lesson for next time.


The next time a woman who I’ve just met asks me my income, it’s going to go something like this:

me: You want to see my tax returns? Fine, I’ll bring them along to the doctor’s office.

she: Doctor’s office?

me: Yeah, when we take you for your virginity test!



DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit