This may be too much!


#1

Well this may be a thread that could be posted in the parenting area, but I put it here since there may be posters who don’t venture into the parenting forum and I need all the help and prayers I can get right now :frowning: .

I went in for my ultrasound today and was told that I’m having a little girl :slight_smile: , but there is something wrong with her. Apparently her arms and legs were measuring too small which leads them to the conclusion that she’s got some kind of skeletal dysplasia, how severe is unknown right now. I had a series of ultrasounds done and then was given my “options” I could terminate right now, continue with more tests and then determine termination then or continue with the pregnancy. I was told that IF she survived after birth she would have significant health problems for the rest of her life which is why I was being given the option to terminate. I said NO termination, so no further testing is required, but I am devastated, trying to wonder how this happened. There is no family history of this and we are not related, apparently being related may cause this…when this was ruled out I asked the doctor what went wrong and he said that it just happened there is no explination.

He said there is always hope, but he wasn’t doing his job if I walked out of there thinking things were going to be okay…that reality was that I was facing a very, very ill child if she even survived. I’m putting this in God’s and the Blessed Mother’s hands, He knows what he’s doing and why and there must be a reason, I will accept His will, but it still hurts and I am very sad about the whole situation. I will continue to pray and yes…hope for a miracle…there is nothing that can be done which makes things harder, I feel helpless because I can’t come to the aid of my precious baby. I beg for your prayers for her, I’m not important here anymore, she is, the name I chose for her is Fatima Abigail, after Our Lady of Fatima (I picked this name before today if she was a girl).

I do feel like this may be too much for me, but I know I must stay strong for both my babies and God will not abondon me…I just wonder why? She has done nothing wrong, I feel like she may be paying for mine and my husband’s sins, my cross is so heavy already, I’m on my knees now and just want my child to be okay :frowning: . Any and all prayers will be greatly appreciated, thank you.


#2

Oh, I am so sorry that this is happening. First of all, know that we are all praying for you and the baby. Second, sonos have been wrong and I mean SERIOUSLY wrong before. I pray that this is the case. And third, no, she is not paying for the sins of you and your husband, nor is this your fault. It’s a helpless feeling when you can’t protect your child, I know. But, Mother Mary understands better than any of us can. Lean on her.


#3

Absolutely praying for you and your baby!


#4

I also posted a prayer request for you and the baby.


#5

I am so sorry, I will pray and you do not give up hope.Pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet every day at three o’clock the hour of mercy.How far along are you?


#6

[quote=Mom of one]Oh, I am so sorry that this is happening. First of all, know that we are all praying for you and the baby. Second, sonos have been wrong and I mean SERIOUSLY wrong before. I pray that this is the case. And third, no, she is not paying for the sins of you and your husband, nor is this your fault. It’s a helpless feeling when you can’t protect your child, I know. But, Mother Mary understands better than any of us can. Lean on her.
[/quote]

Ditto everything Mom of One says! How many would not be with us today, had mothers & dads listened to such warnings and gave up on their babies!? God will give us no more than He knows we can deal with. He will give you the strength to bear this. I will finish my rosary for you and your baby tonight.
:blessyou: Beth


#7

I had ultrasounds of my 2nd DS that showed he had many signs of Down Syndrome and was told I could abort, which I refused straight away. He was born healthy. Not to raise your hopes, because God’s will is perfect, but the ultrasounds can be wrong or misleading.
We did grieve the potential health effects and the loss of our “perfect” dreams, but knew in our heart that God will only give us what He thinks we are capable of - as I know you know in your heart too.
God Bless and be sure of our prayers. Persevere in trust and faith. Good luck. :slight_smile:


#8

Lexee:

Your latest post brought me to tears with empathy but I know you CAN handle this. You are so strong and so brave and so many of us admire your tremendous courage. My child born with a birth defect (though different from what you are describing) is as dear to me as my own life. A smile on his crooked little face is as beautiful as the most perfect sunrise. You do need to prepare yourself for everything from absolutely nothing wrong to profound disability. Learn all you can about this potential challenge. Keep you eyes and mind open to the facts and solid medical advice.

Remember always, God is with you every step of the way. He is loving you through the pain and every smile your imperfect child gives you is like a beam of light reflected straight from God. Give thanks for the the gift of this life, and as the poster before said, implore Mary for her support and guidance to meet your daily needs. You continue to be in our tears, our hearts and our steadfast prayers.


#9

I will pray for you and your precious baby. Sonograms can be wrong. Even if it in not, God will give you the strength and grace to get through this.

I was born with a heart problem in which the doctors told my mom I would die. Well obviously they were wrong and I’m still here at 33. I had open heart surgery at 7 mo and then again at age 8. We all wish our children to be healthy but sometimes that doesn’t happen. I’ve been in and out of hospitals all my life but not for one second I wished that I was never born.

I remember a cardiologist saying to me about getting pregnant “You wouldn’t want to take the chance of be saddled with a child wih major medical problems.” I wasn’t as outspoken as I am now but I was thinking “What like my mom was with me?” Your daughter will be precious and perfect to you regardless of what medical conditions she may or may not have. It seems so scary right now with all the “what ifs” but you will get through it.

I will bepraying for you and your little girl. You hang in there.


#10

May the Lord Jesus and the Blessed Mother hold you and your little one close within Their Most Sacred and Immaculate Hearts.


#11

we are praying for you and baby.

we just went thru this with DD, who after a series of ultrasounds at a major university med center, was told his brain was not developing, too small, and he would be born with only a rudimentary brain, severely disabled, and probably not survive infancy. He was 10 lbs, has a beautiful head, completely normal, and she had a rough delivery because they were expecting a much smaller baby. Turns out they had been looking at the other end all this time. His is 18 months old, bright, active, beautiful and completely normal. He is actually smarter than both his parents put together. (his butt is cute, too).

point is, these tests are not foolproof, and neither are the diagnoses and predictions based on the tests. YOu have the right idea, put this in God’s hands, pray, and let Mary be with you on this journey.


#12

{{{{HUGS}}}} and prayers that the sonogram IS wrong! You’ve been having such a rough time of it lately, I really hope she’ll be alright.

Anna x


#13

((( :love: ))) Lexee, I am so sorry to hear this. I am hoping and praying that your daughter is born sound and healthly and you too have a safe and healthly pregnancy. As the mother of a teenage boy born with autism, non-verbal, and his funcutioning level is so low he is also considered to be mentally retarded, My husband struggles with this guilt somewhat still toay. He was 30 when we married, (I was just 20 and a virgin) he lived with someone, had many girlfriends that he had slept with, even paid for an abortion for one girl, to later find out he was one of 3 men who paid for it. Before he met me he Confessed and repented, returned to the Church and lived a chaste life. He told me everything before we married in 1976. Our last child born in 1988, is the one who was born disabled. I just recently set it up for him to speak with another Priest about this (he’s too embarrassed to speak to Our Pastor about his past sins) What I am trying to say, I seem to be rambling, is let go of the guilt, don’t wait years keeping this inside as he did, God does not “punish” innocent children for our sins. Talk to someone, your Priest. My belief is whatever may happen, its God’s plan for all of us. Having my son has helped me to have a deeper understanding of my Faith and more care and concern for people with disabilities. And as our Pastor said during the Homily for his First Commuion, “Tony already has the Faith and Purity that we all strive for” God Bless you Kay:gopray2:


#14

Lexee, please be assured of my prayers also. You and baby are mentioned othe Rosary for CAF members…rosaries go out for Fatima!


#15

I will pray for you and your baby as well!


#16

Praying for you and baby!


#17

I will be praying for you and your baby.


#18

Lexee, You and Fatima Abigail will be in my prayers.
I am very happy that you refused all further tests. Ultrasounds can be wrong. God and Mother Mary are watching over you and protecting you.


#19

Lexee -

I’ve PM’d you. I am your Catholic sister in Christ, and I’m 3rd generation with dwarfism. Please please, PM me. Do not dispair. Blessed Margaret of Castillo and St. John the Dwarf are praying for you and your little girl.

You can find the Medical Advisory Board for Little People of America (the national group for people with dwarfism) at www.lpaonline.org -

Please - I’m here for you! Kelly aka Kage


#20

My sister’s friend just gave birth to a baby. She was told the exact same thing after her ultrasound, that the arms and legs were measuring small and they predicted all sorts of horrible things for her baby. The poor girl was a basketcase through her pregnancy, and she already had a child with disabilities.

Turns out the baby is completely normal and healthy. Don’t stress yourself out right now. These “diagnoses” are wrong all the time. Put this in God’s hands and try not to worry about it right now. ( I know, easier said than done)


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