Hello to everyone, and this being my 1st post I’ll just cut right to the chase regarding why I just signed up.
My wife and I have had some heated debates regarding tubal ligation. She has already signed the papers to receive this procedure after our 4th child is born in 8 weeks. This is completely against my wishes, however there is nothing I can do to stop this (legally). She has the state covering all costs, and therefor I have no rights as a husband to stop this from occurring. So now I’ve turned to our Blessed Mother and JPII for a miracle in that this procedure will not be able to take place.
We had used condoms for 6 months earlier in our marriage, but I put a quick end to that once I finally listened to the Lord telling me to stop. We’ve practiced NFP since, but our most recent child was conceived on the safest day of the month, which must be why NFP isn’t 100% when used properly. So now she has absolutely no faith in NFP.
If the procedure does occur, I do have some concerns for our life afterwards:
- Sexual relations: I can’t help but think that I’m somehow condoning the ligation if I have marital relations with my wife after the procedure takes place. I’ve asked St. Joseph for the strength to endure that decision, after all…who better to ask for chastity prayers than him. Sex doesn’t occur often anyway, so I’m praying that if this is the answer the transition to full chastity will be relatively painless.
- Her participation at Mass: We both know it is a grave sin to commit this, but she’s going to do it anyway as she does not want anymore children, period. I know it’s my duty as a husband to get her to confession, but will she truly be sorry for this. I know it’s eventually possible, but she shouldn’t be receiving until that time…and I know she will still receive regardless (I blame this on her upbringing and lack of religious discipline in her faith formation).
Any words of encouragement, or information would be much appreciated. I do have other concerns and quesitons, but I may wait to post them.