Two residences, which parish?


I struggled with where to begin this thread. I hope the moderator will find an appropriate home for it if this is not adaquet. Especially if it may get more attention somewhere else.

Basically speaking without getting into a long story, I will summarize my issue:

I will likely be living in two distinct residences. One, (primary residence) near my work, during the week, and the other a weekend home 65 miles away from the primary residence. This isn’t an easy decision. Family, friends and a love of the area drive my need to live far from where I work. Finances are forcing a much reduced living style where I am essentialy dividing my means by a factor of 2. (in other words both residences suffer in value)

Desiring parish involvement (RCIA, possibly ST. Vincent Society etc etc.) I am wondering how best to accomplish this. Obviously I will need to fulfill my Sunday obligation in the seconday residence. Most parish activities are during weekday nights when I will be 65 miles away.

Anyone else here find themselves in the same situation? How has it worked for you? I realize this is not a very common issue, but I will hope I get some respondents anyhow.



We’re not in a similar situation distance-wise… but my husband likes to attend daily Mass at a different parish than our regular home parish (it’s on his way to work and has a perfect time to attend)…

We are “members” at our home parish and attend Sunday Mass there and truly call that “home”… contribute financially on a weekly basis…
But we also enjoy our secondary parish… go to their annual parish festival and contribute financially on a monthly basis… not as much as our primary, but since DH “takes advantage” of the daily Mass, we also like to support them.

HTH a little! Not an identical situation, but certainly not unique!
I don’t see why you can’t participate during the weekdays at one parish and weekends at the other. Just mention your situation to the pastors and see how they can accommodate your desire to be involved when you’re available! :slight_smile:


Are they both equal in fidelity to the magisterium, quality/character of the priests, devotionals offered, amount of things offered that would be of interest to you?


It seems to me that in such a situation you need to figure out how you can be of service to either or both parishes.

RCIA may not be the best choice unless you are planning some role that doesn’t require both Sunday and weekday commitments.

If your weekend time is all that you spend with family you probably ought not get involved in something that requires a lot of weekend time, (unless your family also participates.) But if you are living alone during the week you can probably afford to spend above average time in weekday only activities.

Financially, you really should contribute *something *to both parishes since you will be using the resources of each. But perhaps you can contribute mostly time at one parish and mostly financially at the other.


your residence is wherever you decide it is, and you may attend Mass at any parish you wish, and you may become active and support any parish you wish, but you should register with the parish where you will be giving financial support so you can get a record for taxes. there is no obligation whatever to support 2 parishes, nor to support either parish beyond what is reasonable in your income situation. there is no problem here, no discussion needed. however do bear in mind it is not reasonable to expect a parish in which you do not reside, in which you are not active other than Mass attendance, and for which your provide no support, financial or otherwise, to be forthcoming in meeting your needs for RE for you kids, etc.

Attend RCIA wherever it is most convenient for your schedule. For instance, since there is a college in our parish boundaries, we accept students who live on campus in RCIA even though they may still be members of their home parishes in other towns, and go home on weekends and the summer. We had a candidate a couple of years ago who split his RCIA class time between us and a parish in north Texas where he spent half his time because of his business.


Thank you, all good advice.

My children are on thier own at this point living in the area I will be on weekends and vacations (the secondary residence).

I think the best way for me to deal with this will be to “register” with the parish associated with the secondary residence and conrtibute financially there (more so). While attending (when I can) weekly Mass in the area of the primary residence and contributing on an occasional basis financially.

My activities will have to selected accordingly and primarily associated with the secondary residence (to what willl amount to a limited extent given the circumstances).

Again, thank you to those who replied.


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