Two souls

As I attend Church each Sunday with my family everything seems familiar, but somehow I don’t seem to fit anymore. There is comfort in the songs we sing and partaking of the Sacrament. It feels good and right to be with my family, yet my questions and disbelief grow.

There is no great sin in my life. I do not read anti-Mormon literature and find it offensive. I have been depressed for some time and there is an emptiness that I have not been able to fill.

Why is the Lord doing this to me? Why can’t I find the anwers I’m looking for in my own faith which is so dear to me?

I have been going to the local Catholic Church about once a week catching the end of a mass or just walking around the grounds or sitting quietly and praying in the sanctuary. It is unfamiliar, yet peaceful,and stirs a longing within me.

I feel like I have two souls in me. Sometimes they coexist peacefully and at other times they do not. I am afraid that one day they will tear me apart and there will be nothing left of me.

The only advice I can give you is, keep praying about it and try to be open to whatever God is calling you to do.

About a year ago I felt a similar experience, mine was a kind of pulling from two ends. Like when two people are pulling on each of your arms. But mine experience was like this, I felt something in the Catholic Church and it pulled me, yet I didn’t know why, my wife and her family were pulling me toward evangelical protestantism and a renouncement of any ideas I had toward the Catholic faith.
It was a very difficult time for me as I would sit in church and be kinda looking at myself from outside thinking if I really was doing what I should be doing, or was I just serving my own wants or my wifes.
For all of us it sometimes is harder to look at things truthfully and with charity, so all I can say to you is pray, pray, pray. Put your trust in God, and follow Him. It might put you through the grinder, but if you are true to God then you will be all right.
For some it takes years to find peace, I found it after about 8 months and thank God now I am at peace and free, in the Catholic Church.

God Bless

Love God above all things. Love the truth and the truth will set you free. "Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but by me.’ "[John 14:6]

Pray for guidance and let the Holy Spirit lead you home. Hang around these forums and get your questions answered. Read scripture and good Catholic materials and books. You will find your way. The Lord never disappoints those who seek him with a honest and humble heart.

You will be in my prayers.

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