In the last year or so, I’ve found myself accidentally seeing bits of information that I wasn’t meant to see, or learning things I wasn’t meant to know. It’s terribly uncomfortable and in some ways embarrassing. Things like overhearing a private conversation, being told something that was meant to be kept in confidence, and learning of someone’s income level. I just don’t want to know certain things.
One is particularly inappropriate and uncomfortable to know. I accidentally found out what someone I know had in a Sunday donation envelope. It was a surprisingly small amount in proportion to their lifestyle. I wish I didn’t know this. I know one week’s envelope doesn’t matter, that they could very easily give a larger donation at the end of the year, that it’s none of my business, that there’s no room for me to judge them whatsoever and on and on.
But I have this annoying scrap of information in my head. I can’t kick it out. So when I see this family buying dinners out every night of the week and buying new things, having “me” days at the salon and so many expensive treats…that little piece of information pops back into my head, unwanted. I do not want to have this in my head anymore. I don’t like feeling like I am judging another family for how they give and how they live.
How can just remove this information from my memory banks! I wish I never saw the check. :imsorry: