I am having a problem with a person in my life, my father and I need good advice about how to deal with the situation…
I try to be brief. My father has sold his house 900 miles away and has turned up at my door. He has been using my guest room on and off for 2 months now. He has forwarded his mail to my house without asking me permission… These are the basics.
Now the complications. I have a very superficial relationship with my father. He abandoned our family when I was a teen and left us in poverty for many years. He ran off with a woman who he married and started a whole new life with her and her children. For many years , I had no contact with him. Now the woman he left us for has died, so he sold his house and is in the process of pursuing relationship with another woman who lives in the West Virginia. The woman seems to be only casually interested in him so in between visit sto his girlfriend he is invited himself to stay at my house.
This is causing me extreme distress. I feel drawn into a obligation that I am not psychologically able to handle.
To complicate matters further my husband has been very accommodating to my father because my father has been helping him with many household repairs that we have not been able to afford to hire people to do.
I am unable to deal with him because he has not changed in any way and I feel I am being used because he doesn’t know where to go and he doesn’t like to be alone. He is basically following me around all day, he even shows up at my office to bother me there. Last week he called my office to ask me if I was busy. I said yes and he proceeded to ask me if I would go on the internet and shop for a TV for his girlfriend. I was at work! I have no escape from him. I feel like I am being stalked.