Urgent: What should I do?



I have two rather urgent questions.

1.) My aunt had a stroke and is in a rehabilitation facility. She cannot speak (she can only say several words) and her writing does not make complete sense. She is able to understand what is being said to her, and she can nod and shake her head to answer questions.

She had been away from the Catholic Church, but returned last year or the year before. She returned to the Church a while before she had the stroke. I believe I remember her saying that she hadn’t gone to Confession (she said this quite a while before her stroke). I don’t know if she had confessed her sins before the stroke, and I haven’t asked her about it. I think she had been receiving Communion once she returned to the Church. I guess if she didn’t feel the need to go to Confession when she returned to the Church, she didn’t meet the 3 criteria for committing a mortal sin when she left the Church.

Here’s my first question: should I call the rehab place and have a priest or someone else visit her tomorrow for Easter? The person would probably be bringing the Eucharist.

2.) Second question: my dad left the Church years ago (before I was born). I invited him to go to Mass with me tomorrow. If he goes, should I tell him not to receive the Eucharist?


to the first question, I would let the rehab place make arrangements for her to receive communion and considering it is Easter Sunday and a holiday, I probably wouldn’t set my hopes up high that someone is available to come, it may be later. Whether she went to confession or not is really not any of your business and that whole issue ought to be left in God’s hand, it isn’t for you to worry about.
About your father, Yes if he has been away from the Church a long time he shouldn’t be receiving communion but if you are inviting him, would he get upset if you mention to him he shouldn’t go up and in response not want to go? With knowing he state of mind or understanding, that is kinda a tough one. Is he open to going on Easter?


Thanks for the reply.

I’m not sure how often priests or Eucharistic ministers visit the place. I was going to call the rehab place and ask if they could get someone to visit her. I told her I would try.

And I’m not sure if my dad is going to go with me or not.

  1. There should be no problem asking for a priest to visit your aunt. Only she and God really know if she properly prepared to receive Eucharist the first time she returned to the Church, and I would leave that there. Anyone who is gravely ill should have a visit by their priest and be offered the sacraments.

  2. You father is an adult. Let him make the choice about receiving the Eucharist. That he has even considered going to Mass may be the beginning of his return after a long absence. He can see a priest later if he chooses. You can always simply let him know the confession schedule at your parish and invite him to go if he wishes. Let God do the rest.


Can you ask your aunt if she wants to receive confession? Although, I’m not sure how that works if she can’t speak and can’t write.

If your father wants to receive the Eucharist, you could remind him that reconciliation is a first step and leave it at that.

One, or both, are probably eligible for the Anointing of the Sick. Before, it was called, “The Last Rites”, but nowadays, it is for anyone of advanced age or in danger of death.

It’s no longer necessary to actually be dying in order to receive it. In fact, I know of one Catholic hospital that anyone who underwent surgery who wanted Anointing of the Sick got it.

I’m going in probably sometime this year for ankle surgeries. I will turn 50 y.o. next month and don’t really consider myself old, but I think I’ll see a priest before I go in just to be on the safe side.


My father passed away in September, and I was the one who pushed that he got Anointing of the Sick. It wasn’t even that he was opposed to it, in the end. It was mainly that everyone seemed to busy with his care that it seems to have never have even crossed their minds.

Now, I’d like to mention this to my mother, who will turn 89 y.o. in a couple of months. I’d like her to know she can have that sacrament. When we get to that age, one just never knows, better to be safe than sorry.

  1. Call a priest.

  2. Praise God. Leave it between him and God.

Just my unworthy thoughts.


Call a priest as soon as possible for your aunt. I think you may need more notice to get one by tomorrow, but one should visit with her soon. If your Dad goes with you to Mass you can “remind” him that he should go to confession first before receiving the Eucharist. He should know that, but if it has been a really long time he may have forgotten.


I am sorry about the lose of your father. Slight correction. Annointing of the sick is not the same as “last rites”. Annointing of the sick is should not wait till someone is on their last legs. It should be done at the start of a serious illness or before surgery etc not waiting on someone’s death bed.


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