Vocation Conflict

Hello everyone. I am currently discerning as to wether I have a vocation to the Jesuits or Missionaries of Charity Brothers or Priests. I feel that I am close to making a decision, but am not quite sure yet. Anyways I have some reservations. My parents agree with the death penalty, my father is not very compassionate towards the poor (like I am), and they have somewhat of a distaste for nuns and other religious, sometimes making fun of them. Should I join regardless of what they think?

I am honestly to the point where I will join regardless of what they think. Even if it means leaving them on a bad note, my life will be empty if I do not follow my call from God. I need to serve the poor. I also want to fight poverty through education. I’m just very confused.


Regardless of what your parents think, follow God. You and your family will be in my prayers!

This is something I would like an answer for, too. I would definitely talk to a priest about it. I suppose it depends on your parents. If they do not support Church teaching, or are lax about their faith, their opinion probably shouldn’t be weighted as much as say, the opinion of parents who are very faithful, ardent Catholics. That’s not to say that more lax parents are bad, but they are more likely to misunderstand your intentions.

I think, ultimately if you follow God, and make your decision about God, and not about just doing something because your parents disagree, then your decision is sound. It may hurt your parents, but following God is more important. And, eventually they will come around I think, when they see you are happy and fulfilled. But please do speak with a priest or director about this; I wouldn’t take action without sound advice from someone qualified to give it.

Have you spoken to the vocation director of your diocese, or to the vocation director of either order?

Sounds like you need to meet with the vocations directors for both orders.

Follow the Call of The Lord, and He will guide you.

How “Accademic” are you. The Jesuit order tend to push most of their young men in the direction of at least 1 PhD, and many do more than one. If you’re not a very academic type of person then the Missionaries of Charity might suit you and your desires better.

While the Jesuits are the *most *academic order: Any candidate for the priesthood needs to be able to study for a very intensive degree in Philosophy and Theology, sometimes this is 2 separate bachelors degrees.
Brothers on the other hand only need a lower standard of education unless they are training in a field of work which requires more academic or vocational study. If you join an order which has Brothers and Priests, you would normally join as a brother, and if the order feels you have the aptitude across a range of areas they would then decide whether or not to put you forward for formation as a priest.
I have a friend who I was in high school with. He was ordained as a priest about 2 years ago by the CFR (Charismatic Fransiscans… best known as the Order co-established by Fr. Stan: the rapping priest).

It looks like you are discerning two things. One is what your charism should be (serving the poor or intellectual work), the other is whether you should become a Priest or a brother.

The Jesuits does not always become Priests (most often nowadays though), and like you said, there are also male MC groups out there who also serve without ordination.

At least with the MC Fathers, you do not simply join. First you come as an aspirant, which is a period where you live with and work the MC:s and where you get to know the order a little better. If you both feel like you are being called, then you join for postulancy…

About your parents - what you are describing is sinful behavior, and that should not influence your decision…

The best of luck in your discernment.

Mother Teresa of Kolkata, pray for us!

Saint Ignatius of Loyola, pray for us!

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