My MIL and I went to mass this morning and afterwards I was able to catch up with the priest and we had a short meeting. He was very nice, but for some reason I have always been nervous when speaking to a priest save for one. That was Father Alex at my old Catholic church in Conshohocken.
Anyway, he confirmed that I am unable to attend confession and communion. He also confirmed that I have to get my marriage convalidated. Until my wife agrees to it, I cannot go to confession or communion.
I did not ask about sexual relations with my wife because I know that if I withhold sex it will drive my wife further away from the church.
On the bright side, when I told my wife about what the priest said, she said to look at it as a chance for another ceremony where this time at least we will be inviting family.