Was I in the wrong?

My parish only has the option of (official) adoration (with the monstrance on the altar, not just praying in front of the Tabernacle) once a month for about 10 hours, except in the summer (when we don’t have it at all) and after Holy Thursday Mass (in the meeting room for 2.5 hours, before it is put away until the Vigil Mass). As this is pretty rare, my husband and I went today (with the expectation that we’d be alone like most times) with our 9 month old daughter. Of course she doesn’t understand that she needs to be quiet, so we took turns walking her around the church pointing out the Stations of the Cross or the stained glass windows and explaining them (more for our meditation than her understanding).

Around halfway through the old retired priest who has previously told people not to bring their noisy children into the church so as not to disrupt the sanctity of the place and also to not interrupt other prayers came in as I was explaining the Assumption. He gave me a not friendly look and when I gathered her up and left early, leaving my husband so that we did not put extra burden on Fr in case he did not plan to stay until the next person who signed up for an hour came, he gave me another not so friendly look.

Was I wrong to have brought her to adoration, given I don’t have many opportunities to go without her?

I take it your church does not have a “cry room.”

IMHO, any priest who wants to get rid of the cry room in his parish should be handed a tired, fussy baby and asked to keep it quiet for an hour. :smiley:

I don’t think you did anything wrong. Jesus said to let the little children come unto Him. I think He’d rather have you visit with your daughter than not visit at all.

(This reminds me of a story St. Faustina told about in her diary. She was in the chapel one day, praying, when another nun sitting next to her started coughing and coughing. It made it difficult for Faustina to concentrate on her prayers. She thought about moving a distance away from the coughing nun but thought this other sister might be insulted by her moving. So she stayed. Later Jesus spoke to St. Faustina and told her that if she had moved, he would have removed from her all the grace she was receiving by her prayers in the chapel.)

We had a cry room, but we had to get rid of it for a legitimate confessional (one that allows both privacy and face-to-face).

No you were not in the wrong, in fact I would have thanked you for coming. Our parish has a school and it is like pulling teeth to get many of the parents to just bring their kids to Sunday Mass.

That’s a shame. Well, in that case, it’s unreasonable to expect parents to keep an 8-month-old quiet in church.

Personally, I am surprised by the priest’s response and hope you misunderstood it.

Adoration may not ve the best place for children but if your family was the only ones signed JP that hour …then you were not imposing on another …

I have been in the process of removing a crying infant from the Mass and had priests interrupt with the instruction to “don’t take the baby out”. Other priests have said to those with small children …" Sit in the front where they can see and do not take them out even if they cry" … I guess I have been lucky …

Jesus said “Suffer the little children to come unto me.” I tell parents how much we want them to come to church …even if its hard …that’s why ‘suffer’ was chosen to describe it …its not supposed to be easy ;)… Babies and children are the same today as they were 2000 years ago…families were the same as well …some highly functional - some dysfunctional …

Take a deep breath and pray for the priest and others who foster a single dimensional view of worship and piety that is somber, silent and almost mournful …you know that David danced (even naked), sang and played music before the Lord …you can spend time with Jesus in prayer (both silent and vocal), in laughter and smiles and even in the pratter and wails of children …my two cents. :). Our Lord created a complex and multidimensional universe.

You did nothing wrong.

Father does not have the proper disposition. You are well within your rights to come to adoration.

Pray for your priests.

It is possible that he is not a fan of small children. He probably has none himself. But I think that you are overly sensitive to what you perceive as “not friendly looks.” Don’t worry about such nonsense.

You’re fine. He is from another era. We see it all the time on CAF. Some like a totally silent church, others don’t mind the human “noise”.
Focus on your prayers and ignore it.
Offer a prayer for him, and know that it pleases the Lord to have children in His presence.
God bless you.

We have taken our children to adoration once a week from birth…If you are wrong then you are in good company.

I have a friend with 8 children. When she has situations that aren´t so child friendly, she has a network of friends. They will try taking turns leaving their kids with them, and vice versa. Can you develop some arrangement like this to give you an uninterrupted hour in front of the Blessed Sacrament once a month, or however often, to keep on good terms with that priest?

lol Good point!


It doesn’t sound like the child was being noisy - it was the mother who was talking. I have more difficulty with the talking adults do in their attempts to amuse their children than I do with the noises babies make. Unless it’s screeching very loudly, which is rare.

I would have have been giving dirty looks, too, along with the priest.

If adults can’t refrain from talking during adoration or mass, they should go outside.

Actually, this was my read as well. Perhaps the poor priest had received some complaints. Many people find the silence of Adoration a particularly blessed and grace-filled time.

Pope Francis Baptized 33 infants this year in the Sistine Chapel. He had this to say during his Homily.

“You mothers give your children milk and even now, if they cry because they are hungry, breastfeed them, don’t worry,” he said, departing from his prepared text. The written text of his homily had the phrase “give them milk,” but he changed it to use the Italian term “allattateli”, which means “breastfeed them,” and added that they should not hesitate.

The Sistine Chapel does not have a cry room. He wanted those mothers to keep their children at Mass. And I would be very surprised if the Pope himself was not pleased as punch with the “noise”

I would agree that it is not acceptable for adults to be talking during adoration. This is pretty much a universal tradition of the Church during times of Eucharistic Adoration.

Yeah…probably not. :smiley:

In the church I go to, it is very noisy. Adults are in little groups, talking to each other. These are all senior citizens, mind you. You’d think they were at a party or something.

I remember one church I used to attend a while ago. During the penance service, kids were running amok down the aisles, hanging around by the other people who were trying to confess. They seemed unaware. A couple brought their child up for confession and all three did the confession together.

Sometimes things get a little distracting.

Well, yeah, That situation would upset me greatly.
I agree. the older people in my parish are the worst offenders at not maintaining sacred silence. I think it’s because they meet their friends at Church, and so glad to talk to someone. They’re lonely, most likely. It’s incredible how some cradle Catholics forget what we have been blessed with.
I have to remind myself all the time.
Good reminder.

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