Wearing a Veil?


#1

There are a few older women at our church who wear veils. One homily our favorite pastor talked about how the Church never really said that it was OK to stop wearing head coverings. I guess it was a miscommunication, people started spreading this misconception that you didnt have to wear coverings anymore after vatican 2 and the Church never really spoke out to correct people. Anyway, he said that really woman still should. That got me thinking and reading about it. I think i would like to wear a veil? I might be self conscience at first but i think its really important too.

Anyway before i could come to a conclusion on what i was going to do my 6 yr old daughter pointed out one of the woman at our Church who wears one and said…I WANT ONE TOO! she walks around the house wearing one and being like Mary she says. One Sunday morning she was wearing her makeshift veil and wanted to wear it to Church and my husband wouldnt let her. So i researched veils and childrens veils. I sat down with her and explained that you can only wear a veil if you wear a veil over your heart and understand the role of a woman in the Church and in her family. She really seems to grasp it, she wants to practice being humble like our Heavenly Mother and i want to encourage it.

What do you all think about wearing a veil, either for yourselves or your children?? Do any of you wear one in a church where most of the woman don’t? Is that odd? I will be ordering veils for all our girls and myself this weekend and would love to hear your thoughts as well as what type and colors are most appropriate.

THANKS!
~Angela


#2

I wear a veil that I got from Halo-Works.com, and I got a chapel cap for my daughter (3, does not currently wear it).
If your daughter wants a Mary looking veil, however, I would recommend the scarves by Headcoverings by Devorah (called Tiechel). Let your daughter pick out the one she likes on either site.

Last Sunday, I attended a more modern parish, so I decided to wear my daughter’s chapel cap instead of my mantilla to be less conspicuous. Well, during the homily, my daughter pulled my mantilla from my purse, brought it over to me and said “Mama, that’s my Jesus hat, this is yours” and gave me the mantilla. Well, at that point, I had to switch to the mantilla! What else can you do when you’ve been corrected by a 3 year old? :smiley:
Good luck, and welcome to the club!


#3

Is any type of veil ok or should I look for something specific. The tiechels are so cute! Can I wear one of those or do I need a mantilla, specifically?

Thanks!


#4

Funny you should bring this up b/c I just looked this up myself as there is a church nearby where i live that still does the old Latin Mass and encourages wearing veils. I didn’t think they were still mandatory, so I looked it up.

What your priest told you is only half the story: yes there was a miscommunication after Vatican 2 about wearing veils. I guess some reporter asked a bishop if veils would still be required after Vatican 2 and he said “no comment” but the story got printed as “veils won’t be required” so people stopped wearing them. Even when the Church said that it wasn’t true, so many people had stopped that the Church didn’t bother enforcing it. In 1983, however, the Church did officially remove the requirement from canon law. So up until 1983, your priest was correct ;).

I don’t wanna wear a veil, but maybe that’s b/c I’m young and don’t remember the days of veil-wearing women to church (I was just born in 1983 when the rule was removed, for goodness sakes) so maybe I see it as “old-fashioned”. I think it’s wonderful if your children wanna wear one, I don’t see what it can hurt!


#5

Hahaha that’s amazing!!! So much for being discreet! :smiley:


#6

You could wear an old t-shirt up there on your head, if you wanted. :smiley:
I, personally, am lookin into switchin to the tiechel


#7

I actually wear a veil to church and I am only 27… I wear it because i felt i wear a veil for first communion and one for my future wedding day that why only on those two days should i wear it? Aren’t i always a daughter and a bride of christ? Shouldn’t i always be veiled?

Wearing a veil has been a life changing experience. IT’s scary the first few times and i was nervous what my friends would think. I heard a few comments about being an old women but it has brought so much to my spiritual life that ever rude comment has been worth it. People lash out at what they don’t understand. Luckly I have a good group of girlfriends and we have all started to wear veils. It’s become normal to see them at the young adult mass . Everyone should try it.


#8

You can get beautiful veils on eBay. Search for “mantilla.” If you want to narrow and customize your search, subtract the terms wedding, bride, bridal, cathedral, fingertip, china, plate, cup, card, Josefina, Barbie, Ray. You then won’t get bridal veils, china, dolls or baseball cards.

Betsy


#9

Not my style…but if it appeals to you…why not?


#10

See, now, when you said veil, I thought face covering, not head covering. Head coverings to me are either bonnets or bandanas.

Well of course you should wear them, silly woman! Ain’t you never read Genesis? Demons will come and rape you if you don’t cover your head! And then there will be giants. So cover your head, cause people don’t know how to use slingshots anymore.


#11

Angela - I have been covering my head at Mass for several months now and I truly do enjoy it. It calms me and helps me focus on where I am and what I’m there for. My husband tells me that the angels are happy now that my head is covered, and he is always lovingly adjusting it around my face for me. :o But he is just sweet like that.

I wear a long lace mantilla in either solid black or black with gray lace around the edge. I recently bought some beautiful sheer fabric and lace and want to make one, but have not had the time, so perhaps in the fall when things slow down a bit. —yeah, right— :wink:

If this is something you are called to do, just do it. And don’t let the discomfort of others keep you from it.

~Liza


#12

I get veils at weddings, as part of the whole virginity now being surrendered to her husband thing…it’s a nod to old customs and ideas, a symbol.

But in everyday life? I am glad the Church removed the requirement. I am not any more evil or sinful than my husband, and I am not any more an instrument of leading people into sin than my husband. So if he is not required to cover his head, why should I be? Because the whole point of the veil’s origins was that women should cover their beauty, as it leads men into sinful thoughts to look at it. (An idea best relegated to the oppressive Islamic countries that still teach it…:mad: )

I have more regard for men and their self-control than that. It’s their responsibility to guard their thoughts, not mine. And it’s not on me if they don’t. I don’t go around purposely trying to attract lustful thoughts, so it’s not my problem if they occur. And besides, my husband is way cuter than me… is he to blame if some woman sees him on the street and starts fantasizing inappropriately? Somehow that idea never gained currency, so if we can’t blame men for other people’s sins, then we can’t blame women for other people’s sins, either.

I have no problem with a woman who chooses to wear a veil. I get that it’s done out of a sense of modesty and respect. I just don’t think I should be forced to do it, and it certainly shouldn’t be church law. Just because of the origins of the idea of covering women more than men, and the reasons for it. I know there are tons of ways that the Church treats women differently from men, and some of them may even make some sense, but lets try to make sure that only the ones that make sense are being enshrined into laws.


#13

Not one single post on this thread said anything about making it “church law” - whatever that is. :rolleyes:

Covering the head at Mass is an act of humility and submission. Some women are cut out for it and some aren’t. That’s not intended as a slight, it’s just how it is and nothing more. No one is trying to put women back in the dark ages, no one is trying to take away the “power” that women seem to feel they have due to the “liberation” of women in this (American) society. There is no threat here. Only women who wish to honor their God as they feel they should - that’s all.

You see - I don’t need to be equal to my husband, or empowered, or whatever it is that some women feel they must control. I can still be a woman in very single sense of the word, and still understand that my husband is the head of my home, and my God the head of my life. And in this I submit myself to them, and I show that submission and humility by covering my head at Mass. Not because I’m afraid some other man might be attracted to me,or because my husband lords over me - that’s the biggest load of rubbish I’ve ever heard, but for some reason it is constantly brought up as excuses for not covering the head.

~Liza


#14

There is only one lady in my parish who wears a mantilla. She is an older lady who only recently started attending Mass in my parish.
I like the tiechel especially as it comes in colors other than black and white. There are a number of African women in my parish who wear headcovers that go with their African dress.
When it comes to fashion, I tend to be a follower and not a leader. As a Eucharistic minister and lector I do not want to draw undue notice to myself. Unless others start wearing the veil, I might do exactly that were I to begin wearing a mantilla or tiechel.
As a child, wearing a hat or scarf to Mass was characteristically Catholic. A female of any age did not enter a Catholic Church without some time of head covering, even if it was the hankerchief from my pocket bobby pinned in my hair. At the time I was unfamiliar with predominantly African American denominations that wear hats to church. Hats were also worn in court, as depicted in old movies along with white gloves. Often those hats were merely a fashion statement and it was hard to find one that looked good on me.
Because this link has come up before, I was thinking about the fashion changes. In the 1970’s, it was common to wear a wide scarf in my hair. Times and fashions have changed.
What is good about the new trend in wearing a veil is that it is less about fashion and more about devotion.


#15

You sound a lot like I use. I use to be the biggest anit-veil person. Like how dare people say that I have to wear a veil when a man doesn’t. OR How dare I be looked upon differently because I am a women…Well God worked on me. I start hearing this voice in my heart say. Why do you hate it? Do you understand it? Why do you think I would make men and women the same? Then it hit me one day in church during a first communion. The little girl looked so cute dressed up looking like a little bride. It was like something hit me head on. I was Jesus’s Bride they day I accepted him and I will always be his bride so shouldn’t I wear the veil too? It took me a long time to gain the courage to wear one. I had nightmare flashes of women pulling it off and screaming at me in church. The first time I wore it I was so nervous because I was afraid that people would think that I was trying to make a point or that I was trying to be a holier than thou person. Instead of understand that I was trying to learn how to submit to God’s will and how to gain more from the Mass and understand the Eucharist better. It has nothing to do with those around me but with my spiritual growth. It truly has helped my soul and faith life grow. I knew it was for me because the one time I didn’t wear it to mass I felt weird. No one is demanding that you wear one but it would be nice if other one didn’t look down upon us veil wearers because we choose to wear one.

by the way it is nothing to do with sinfulness or help distract a man’s lustful thought. Honestly men are men and a women could be in a sack cloth and they could still get excited. I don’t have a problem with a veil at church because it is submitting to God, to me the muslim veils are showing submittance to society.

[FONT=Arial]Lizaanne[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]Thank you for your post. I don’t know about you but I feel it is not restrictive at all but just the opposite. It is so freeing. that’s awesome about your husband. Does he have any friends he could send my way???[/FONT]


#16

That is adorable!


#17

Um…did you read this thread? Because there was a discussion among a few of the early posts about how it used to be Canon Law and that it was removed from Canon Law in 1983…roll your eyes at me all you want, but at least I read the whole discussion.

And what do you mean “whatever that is”? Are you unaware that the Church has a whole legal structure all of its own? If you are, could you stop being dismissive of those of us who do realize that? It’s called Canon Law.

And my being aware of the origins of the idea and practice of requiring women to cover up more than men is neither rubbish nor a sign that I do not accept my husband as head of my family. Man, you sure do assume a lot.


#18

Then call it that. Words mean things - use them properly and you won’t need to be offended by being corrected. I’ve never heard of “church law”, but I have indeed heard of Canon Law.

[quote=duskyjewel]So if he is not required to cover his head, why should I be?
[/quote]

This sounds like you want to be equal to him - how else am I to understand this comment?

[quote=duskyjewel]And my being aware of the origins of the idea and practice of requiring women to cover up more than men is neither rubbish nor a sign that I do not accept my husband as head of my family. Man, you sure do assume a lot.
[/quote]

Yes - I make assumptions based on what people say. It’s all I have to go on when communicating in this format. My sincere apologies if I have misunderstood your comments.

~Liza


#19

It never fails. We get a thread about veils and people’s emotions get all tied up and we getting bickering. I wonder how long before this thread is closed down.:frowning:


#20

Are veils a cultural thing because I can’t say I’ve ever seen anybody wearing one? I would rather wear a hat if we had to cover our heads.


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