Wedding Stipend


#1

Getting married tomorrow. What’s a good stipend for the priest?
Thanks


#2

Well, I don’t know about the stipend, but here’s hoping you have a long and successful marriage.

God bless you 1000 times.


#3

Our church had a note that there was a guideline of $100-$200 for the priest but that couples could donate less or more if their circumstances guided them differently. Does your church have a suggested donation that you could refer to? Perhaps contact the church secretary or the wedding coordinator to find out if they can give you any guidance.


#4

When we got married last year I think we gave around $250. I remember thinking that it should be at least double what we were paying the musicians, since the priest had also met with us a few times in preparation for the ceremony.


#5

[quote="Thomas63116, post:4, topic:195032"]
When we got married last year I think we gave around $250. I remember thinking that it should be at least double what we were paying the musicians, since the priest had also met with us a few times in preparation for the ceremony.

[/quote]

Golly! That's why I'm still single! I can't afford that! ;)

Wait-does the bride's family pay that?! Woo-hoo! Glad I'm a guy! :dancing:


#6

[quote="Rascalking, post:5, topic:195032"]
Golly! That's why I'm still single! I can't afford that! ;)

Wait-does the bride's family pay that?! Woo-hoo! Glad I'm a guy! :dancing:

[/quote]

What? If you are mature enough to get married then you pay for it yourself!

Yep $250 is fair


#7

I was playing around. Hence the smiley faces.

I’d be happy to pay for my wedding. I’m 30 years old, and probably not going to get married for some time, but when the time comes, I’ll be happy to pay for it. Also, I come from a fairly well off family, and weddings are big deals for us. We go all out for them.


#8

[quote="James924, post:1, topic:195032"]
Getting married tomorrow. What's a good stipend for the priest?
Thanks

[/quote]

one useful guideline is the hourly rate for a professional of comparable education such as a lawyer, doctor or accountant.


#9

[quote="puzzleannie, post:8, topic:195032"]
one useful guideline is the hourly rate for a professional of comparable education such as a lawyer, doctor or accountant.

[/quote]

That's good advice.

Congratulations OP! Have a blessed day.


#10

Thanks, everyone.


#11

I think it probably depends on the area, too. I don't think a parish in rural America would expect a $250 stipend. But if you're in a big city, that would probably be about right.


#12

Eee-gat! I didn't know anything about a stipend! I've never heard of such a thing! After my husband and I had our convalidation ceremony (very small, only 3 witness, no other guests), we hand delivered a nice thank-you card and note to our priest. We thought that was such a good idea, and now I worry that our gift was woefully inadequate. Great. :(
BTW: we are new Catholics, I was not raised in the Church, although I was baptized by my birth father as an infant, which is why a convalidation was necessary in the first place, so I had never heard of a wedding stipend. Boy, do I feel like a jerk.


#13

Don’t feel too bad. I can’t remember if we gave our priest anything either. :o I know we didn’t pay the choir. :stuck_out_tongue:


#14

[quote="mommamaree, post:12, topic:195032"]
Eee-gat! I didn't know anything about a stipend! I've never heard of such a thing! After my husband and I had our convalidation ceremony (very small, only 3 witness, no other guests), we hand delivered a nice thank-you card and note to our priest. We thought that was such a good idea, and now I worry that our gift was woefully inadequate. Great. :(
BTW: we are new Catholics, I was not raised in the Church, although I was baptized by my birth father as an infant, which is why a convalidation was necessary in the first place, so I had never heard of a wedding stipend. Boy, do I feel like a jerk.

[/quote]

Don't worry about it. The priest wouldn't want you to worry about it either. God bless...


#15

I seem to remember $200 to the priest, who happened to be my wifes cousin.

Congrats on the wedding.


#16

Thanks for starting this thread, I have the same concern (getting married June 18th)


#17

[quote="crazzeto, post:16, topic:195032"]
Thanks for starting this thread, I have the same concern (getting married June 18th)

[/quote]

Seems to be a lot of us getting married this year. I'm getting married November 6th.

I planned on giving the same hourly rate I would ask for 1 hour as a computer technician, but since the musical director's actually getting 2.5 times that much, ouch.

I better pay more; padre needs a new pair of nun-chuks (jokingly; he's a tai chi fan). :)


#18

[quote="Spencerian, post:17, topic:195032"]
Seems to be a lot of us getting married this year. I'm getting married November 6th.

I planned on giving the same hourly rate I would ask for 1 hour as a computer technician, but since the musical director's actually getting 2.5 times that much, ouch.

[/quote]

Actually, the music director is probably putting in about 4 hours, if not more. The hour mass is just what you guys see - or should I say... hear. :)The couple and the guests hardly ever knows the preparation that goes into it. I know for myself, if I have a 2:00 wedding, I usually start preparing for it (warming up, singing through the music at home, arriving at least an hour before or more to run-through or rehearse the music with the other musicians, prelude music and the nuptial mass) around 10:30a.m./11:00a.m.. And that doesn't include the daily hours of practice during the week to keep the voice in shape and to be sure the music is set "in the voice". I know that is how most of my colleagues prepare for them as well, but everyone is different. Since I don't know his rate, he may actually have a high fee, so it might be more than what the average musician will charge.

But in regards to you question, it depends on the area and parish. In one parish I worked for the common stipend for the priest was $100. At another, more affluent parish I worked at, it was more like $200/$250.


#19

A couple of years ago, I was in the same boat. After checking around, it seemed that about $250 was a suitable stipend, so that's what I gave. Traditionally, I think this is actually the groom's responsibility, not the bride's family as a previous poster suggested.


#20

I am getting married June 5.

In my parish they recommend a $200 stipend for the priest, but you can give any amount you choose.

They also recommend $25 for each altar server.

They require $200 for the organist, $125 for the cantor and $150 for the parish wedding coordinator that you are required to use (she is awesome though and I love not having to worry about anything being wrong at the ceremony).

Becasue we are contributing members of the church we don’t have to pay anything to use the church.


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