Hello to all
You probably do not know me - I am new on here as of tonight - and I became a member because I am needing advice with what to do with my vocation.
I just returned from Stubenville St. Louis Mid-America Catholic Teen Confrence. While in adoration, I felt a sense of complete peace wash over me as I prayed to Christ in the Eucharst. It was as if Christ was saying: "This is the peace found through true love when you have this realtionship with me."
At the end of the confrence, the main Religious Sister there called for young woman who feel the desire to discern/consider religious life - and I couldn’t remain seating, I was so pushed towards this feeling that this vocation needed to be re-opened as an option for me (because I had been treating marriage as my default vocation and had completly ignored the religious life calling since probably 6th grade.)
The bus ride home from that confrence was so peaceful. Since I returned 2 days ago - I have prayed a daily rosary by mysef, read my bible daily in the morning, and journaled with a new devotional book, as well as going to Adoration at a nearby church - I feel as if I can’t stay away from God!
**Here is where the hard part comes in ** I still can see myself as a wife and a mother - something that I’ve loved the idea of since, well, a very long time. I feel at war with myself, and am wondering if this doubt/inner turmoil is one of a couple things:
The devil is trying to convince me that that feeling of a possibility towards the
religious life was just an emotiona high and nothing else.
Christ is trying to say, “no, that’s not quiet right, I’m not calling you to this vocation,
I’m calling you to grow closer to me.”
I am still very attracted to the vocation of marriage - what is the next step?
I am going to go talk to a priest tomorrow about these feelings and Christ’s plan - what are some questions I need to discuss? What is the next step?