What are the necessary steps a teen must take for foster care?


#1

I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to go into foster care. What are the necessary steps in going about doing this?


#2

First of all how old are you? If you are considered to be a child by the law in your state/country you can go to the equivalent of Children’s Welfare Society. Look up in the Yellow Pages.

Also you can phone the Social Services and they will refer you to the proper agency.


#3

You can also go to any police department in your locale. Tell them why you think you need foster care. In some cities, you can dial 9-1-1 if it is a valid reason. In others, you cna dial 3-1-1 for non-emergency services.


#4

[quote=Sunniva]First of all how old are you? If you are considered to be a child by the law in your state/country you can go to the equivalent of Children’s Welfare Society. Look up in the Yellow Pages.

Also you can phone the Social Services and they will refer you to the proper agency.
[/quote]

I am 17. Does a teen’s older age make it less possible for him to be adopted?


#5

I think so and you will need your parents to give up their parental rights in order for you to be adopted. But in most countries the age of maturity is 18 and you are then old enough to make your own decisions.

If you consider yourself to be in any danger from your parents then you should contact Children’s Welfare Society a.s.a.p. You can also contact the police should that be necessary.


#6

If you are 17 you may still be in high school. Go talk to a school counselor or go talk to your parish priest. They will give you guidance from there. You are not helpless in this situation, particular if you are in jeopardy from your folks or perhaps your folks are dying or you yourself have personal issues like addictions, school trouble etc. Whatever the case, There is always the state’s dept. of public assistance too or other charities available. In the Chicago area, we have Mercy Home for Boys and Girls. mercyhome.org/site/PageServer or try a Boys and Girls Club of America or Big Brother/Big Sister program if you are looking for a mentor. bbbsa.org/site/pp.asp?c=iuJ3JgO2F&b=14576

You have options. Talk to an adult! Pray on it!


#7

[quote=Sunniva]I think so and you will need your parents to give up their parental rights in order for you to be adopted.
[/quote]

Assuming you are in the US., your parents would have to give up parental rights OR their parental rights could be terminated by the courts. This does takes time to go through the courts, but the child can be removed from the home if they are in danger, at any time.


#8

[quote=Sunniva]I think so and you will need your parents to give up their parental rights in order for you to be adopted. But in most countries the age of maturity is 18 and you are then old enough to make your own decisions.

If you consider yourself to be in any danger from your parents then you should contact Children’s Welfare Society a.s.a.p. You can also contact the police should that be necessary.
[/quote]

What if one parent is willing to give up their parental rights, but the other one isn’t? My case is not an emergency and does not involve physical danger, but if there is any such thing as justice in this country then there is a line to be drawn with emotional abuse.


#9

If you are a minor, or know of a minor, who is in a situation where the parents are abusing or neglecting you, call Children’s Protective Services or the similar agency in your town. Look in the phone book under city or county offices. Your school principal or guidance counsellor can also call for you. The family court judge, after a CPS investigation, decides whether or not the minor will be removed from the home and placed in foster care. In fact, if you report it at school they are required by law to call CPS, or Family Services, or whatever the agency is called in your town or county. If the situation is an emergency call 911 and report it.

[quote=PMV]I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to go into foster care. What are the necessary steps in going about doing this?
[/quote]


#10

[quote=PMV]What if one parent is willing to give up their parental rights, but the other one isn’t? My case is not an emergency and does not involve physical danger, but if there is any such thing as justice in this country then there is a line to be drawn with emotional abuse.
[/quote]

The state would have to take them to court to terminate parental rights, something that is taken very seriously, obviously.


#11

PMV, depending on what state you live in the laws are different. I was a foster mom in MI so most of what I know comes from there. At 17 if you have never run away you can move out of your home. Another option would be to petition the courts for emancipation. This again varies from state to state but usually the requirements are a parttime job, school attendance, a bank account with a minimum balance(used to be $300, don’t know what it is now). Emotional abuse is soooo hard to prove and tends to be subjective. I tried to get into foster care about 30 yrs ago by reason of physical and emotional abuse…It was decided that my dad was a good parent for beating me and telling me that I was worthless and he hated me and…oh yes, I was possesed by a demon and he needed to beat it out of me was good parenting! Truthfully, if you can hang on for about a year, you might be better off. Only you know if you can hang on though…don’t forget the power of prayer though. I will be praying for you!


#12

You’re an adult at 18, so you wouldn’t need foster care then (and here you wouldn’t be able to get it then)-and I think that even if you set the ‘wheels in motion’ now, you’ll have reached your 18th birthday by the time time legal side is sorted out…I knew a girl who founded ‘aided living’ when she was 16, they just helped her get a flat through social services, because they felt she was ‘too old’ for foster care…But it all depends on what the laws are like where you are. Prayers!

Anna x


#13

[quote=PMV]I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to go into foster care. What are the necessary steps in going about doing this?
[/quote]

I believe that in most states, you’ll be “thrown out” the day you turn 18. Do you have family members you can live with? Or friends? Also, as was suggested above, you can call Child Welfare. Even if they don’t take you away, they will monitor the situation and make some good suggestions.

My sister works for Child Protective. If you want to tell me what state you live in(state only, please), I can contact her and get you some good info.


#14

[quote=Mom of one]I believe that in most states, you’ll be “thrown out” the day you turn 18. Do you have family members you can live with? Or friends? Also, as was suggested above, you can call Child Welfare. Even if they don’t take you away, they will monitor the situation and make some good suggestions.

My sister works for Child Protective. If you want to tell me what state you live in(state only, please), I can contact her and get you some good info.
[/quote]

I do not have family members or friends that I could live with.
I live in PA. If you contact your sister and put the information here it will be appreciated.


#15

I have e-mailed my sister and am waiting for a reply.


#16

You asked previously about the chances of being adopted through the foster care system at the age of 17. I can tell you with pretty good certainty that those chances are zero.

Adoption is taking over the parental rights and responsibilities from the state or the current parents (whichever currently holds those rights). The state would not invest its time and resources for a child who will not even have enough time to bond with a family before those rights are shifted onto the individual.

Most states won’t even pursue 17 year olds who cut school or run away because they will be legal before the court processes are completed.

I do not say this to dash your hopes, but to make them more realistic. So you have crappy parents. You’ll always have crappy parents. It isn’t fair. You are right. But we weren’t promised justice in this world. What you have to do is pick yourself up by your bootstraps and become the adult you are, and seek out the emotional and physical support you need to keep this cycle from repeating in the next generation.

The reason so many people have crappy childhoods is because the parents refuse to grow up and take responsibility for what is entrusted to them. It stinks that the children then get that burden shifted onto them. Many of those children then want to live burden-free (to re-live their childhoods, the way it should have been) when they become adults, which means that the burden again is shifted to their children. Recognize this cycle and stop it.

I haven’t read any of your previous posts so I don’t know what’s going on in your family life. But the reality of the situation, no matter what is going on, is that you have to do something really stinky and accept the reality of your position. If it involves abuse, then you also have to be the responsible one to go through the proper channels to protect yourself. Kids shouldn’t have to do this. You’re right! It is a parent’s job. But they aren’t doing it if they are abusing you.

Some states allow adults to be adopted if there is already a long standing parent-child relationship, in order to make estate planning more simple most notably. I want you to know that adoption is not the way to escape this problem because it won’t make it just go away or be all better. Yes, it would be FANTASTIC to have parents whom you could respect and love and trust. Many people don’t. But that doesn’t mean that you are all alone in this world. Talk to your parish priest or youth group leader or even DRE or RCIA director. Maybe there is someone who would be happy to be a big brother or big sister type sponsor to you.

Foster care will many times mean being shuttled around from house to house, changing schools, sometimes visitation with your parents, being in a house (and bedroom) of several other unrelated children each with their own physical, emotional, or mental difficulties related to their own unfortunate circumstances, being under a different set of rules–which you might not agree with–and more. Foster parents are a loving and giving kind whom I keep in my prayers. They aren’t going to fulfill your fantasy of family life, though. If abuse is occurring, this will definitely be better than staying at home. If not, it might be worse. AND, foster care’s main goal is to re-unite the child with his family.

Start off with your priest and see what advice he gives. He will help you contact the right agencies for your specific situation.


#17

I think at 17 you can become an emanicipated (spelling?) minor. Maybe your parish priest has a family you can live with. Talk to your school counselor and your priest.


#18

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