What do I do?


Here is my problem, Im looking for some good advice. I want to convert to catholicism, however my soon to be wife doesnt want me to. She is Jewish, and is afraid that she wont be accepted among the Catholic community. She likes being involved in all the activities that I do, and all of the organizations that I belong to. I also work a lot on nights, and she works and goes to school during the day. so the only time we get to spend together is one day through the week, and saturday and sunday. She doesnt like the idea that I will have to give up more time to something else. So what should I do, I have to consider her since she will be my wife in a couple of weeks, but I also have to consider my personal religious beliefs. I am stuck…:confused:


You know how Christ says we have to hate our family and whatnot? He doesn’t mean we literally have to hate them, but if their is a conflict between following Him and remaining on good terms with them, we must choose following Him.

That being said, I don’t think your wife has anything to worry about. She’ll be treated as well as she’ll be treated anywhere else, probably better. Obviously, she cannot receive communion, but besides that there shouldn’t be a problem.


Pray to the Holy Spirit for guidance…be patient and merciful to yourself. Do not let your mind drive you, pray, be silent in your mind and wait on the Holy spirit to guide you.

If you know a good priest, go and have a talk with him, but look the guidance of the Holy Spirit above all things.


thank you guys for the advice, I was thinking of going to talk to a priest at the mission by my house. I was also thinking of going to the prince of peace retreat to try to figure things out, and ask God for guidence.


That’s a great idea! IMHO the Jewish people are respected in the Catholic religion more than any other. Even the Pope calls the Jews our “big bothers in the faith”. Our mother, Mary is Jewish and so is our Savior Jesus. Catholicism is the completion of Judaism. I think she might even find things that are familiar to her.


My father was the most traditional Catholic you could find anywhere, and he made sure we understood the Jewish roots of our faith - it is the fruition of it rather than the “replacement” of it - and he always said if he were not Catholic he would have to be a practising Jew because the Jewish faith was the one true church prior to Christ. We were raised with enormous respect for Jewish people because they were the chosen people. Even though we must recognise the differences, how could you not have respect for the people God chose as his own in such an unimaginably special way? I would sincerely hope that your wife-to-be would be welcomed by your parish in the same way we were taught to always respect the Jewish faith and people.


My late brother-in-law was Jewish and he and my sister had a good marriage. Toward the end of his life he was really searching for the truth and investigating Catholicism. I believe that if his life was not cut short he would have converted.

One purpose of mariage is to help your spouse get to heaven. Be patient, prayerful, and loving. Let her know that you have found the truth in your life and that conversion is important to you.

I’m assuming you have not started RICA yet. Invite her to attend with you to observe. She will not be the only non-catholic in that group and it may make her feel more comfortable.

Most important- pray together! Rembember we believe in the same God. Instead on focusing on differences, prayer will help you see the truths that you share.

Prayers for you and God bless.


Well…Edith Stein was Jewish and converted after years of studying, to HER becoming Catholic was ‘to be truly fullfilled Jewish’, Catholicism was the fullfilment of her Judaism…If you look, there are soooo many Jews who became Catholic! My grandma was one of them, at the age of 42 in 1954, 4 out of her 7 children converted with her (the adult ones remained Jewish, just like my grandad), and really: she made so many friends! I don’t think her having been Jewish was ever a problem, and for my grandfather, the fact that he never converted (he died in 1991) never stopped him being a part of his wife’s circle of friends!

So, don’t ‘assume’ it’ll be a problem: let her meet people! And remember: Jesus, Mary and Joseph were all Jewish, and Jesus said he came not to break the Law, but to fullfill it! So, he never ‘stopped’ being a Jew, he fullfilled it by founding the Church through Peter! Or as my grandma used to say: the Jews are the children of God, but thanks to Jesus we’re ALL adopted children of God! Which I think puts it quite nicely!

Anna x


Like the others have said, I think your soon to be wife will be pleasantly surprised at how respectful Catholics are to those of the Jewish faith. The fact that we share history with them is just the beginning.


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