What do you do when a love feels so right but is very wrong?


#1

My sister is falling in love. She has two kids from a previous marriage gone disasterous! She is not practicing any religion right now and he is catholic. (what is it about catholic guys that make women fall in love anyway :D) They have been good friends for litle over two years now. And that was fine until they discovered they loved each other. Then no more hanging out as friends, because they both felt more than friendship with each other. He has told her that according to his faith she is still married even though divorced. It is possible she could get an annulment. But in the mean time they cannot see each other or ANYTHING! Everything is wrong. But they both agree that their union would be wonderful… he adores her kdis and they him, they fit together like nothing youve ever seen before. The light in their eyes can be seen on the brightest of days. They really do love each other. Just cant be together. So, she is wondering what is she supposed to do with her love. She claims he is her soul mate and she cant think of ever living her life without him.
But if his faith prevents them from being together, where do they go from here? Not even thinkable to say ‘goodbye’. She really needs some advice here.


#2

I’ll make this short. To the catholic, love is not REAL love unless it puts God first. If God is not first, than love is NEVER as good as it could be. To deny this fact is to endanger one’s faith. My fiancee and I will keep them in our prayers.


#3

The longer she delays getting the anullment, the worse her situation will be.

The anullment is not negotiable. It’s all or nothing. If she wants him, she needs the anullment.

Tell her to start the process now, and deal with the other issues as they arise. Every day is another day she won’t be with him in real love.

Pick up the phone, find the nearest Catholic church, and make an appointment with a priest.

Time is wasting.


#4

I don’t get it. Does this man agree to marry her if she does get an annulment? Why can’t they see each other? Seems like some information is missing here. If you love someone, you go out and get them, you don’t run from them!

If this person wants to see her committ to her faith before he will committ to her, that is understandable and notable.

On the other hand, sad to say, some people may lead us on to believe they want it all but won’t ever committ.


#5

Whether or not she can actually get an annulment is up in the air, and we have no information about her first marriage to even begin to speculate.

They can and should continue being good friends while she is working out the annulment thing. They do not need to say “good bye” but they should not behave like a married couple either. That much is true regardless of anything else. Their current relationship should be the same as it would be were they never to marry, because nobody knows when or if she will ever be free to marry him. Her annulment may not be granted and they both need to be prepared for that.

Most people begin a new love affair before their annulment comes through and when it’s denied they end up leaving the Church because they are already so deeply invested in the relationship, thus putting each other before God. This is a very delicate situation and hopefully they will proceed with caution.


#6

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