Once again I very much appreciate your encouragement and uplifting words. I am acquainted with the stories of St. John Vianney and most of the others you have mentioned. I am considering other orders but I am concerned about my chances. I think that the part of the reason that I was not able to secure a position in the neighboring Diocese is that the recommendation from my home Diocese was unfavorable. It would be the same problem with applying to the Dominicans, the Franciscans, the Jesuits etc. The recommendations from my parish priests are good, the recommendation from my former Rector are good, my academic record is good, but the recommendations from my own Vocations Office sink my ship. It is great to take inspiration from the saints of the past but I am not a saint. I am just a man who was sure he was called by God and wanted to be a priest more than anything else in the world. Now it seems like I will be blocked where ever I turn and I don’t even know why. I just don’t understand! Our Diocese closed at least 10 churches last year-- just in the towns around where I grew up. The reason they gave was lack of support and lack of vocations. The school in my home town used to be staffed completely by religious sisters. When I went through it there were only four sisters left. Since then all the Sisters left and they tore down the convent—again “no religious vocations”.
I came from a very small country parish. Yet at one time we sent 3 men to the seminary—I was one of them. Since then I was dismissed, one of the others was essentially shunned by the Diocese after he graduated from minor seminary and there is only one left. Every Monday in my home Parish there is a special service–for vocations! I cannot help being angry. Our Bishop closes church after church because ‘there are no priests’ yet when you try to become a priest they throw you out like yesterday’s coffee grounds and don’t tell you why and won’t lift a finger to help you find a vocation somewhere else.
**“He came to his own home, and his own people received him not.” **John 1:11