I understand the desire of baptism. Ive been studying catechism for over 4 years I know pretty much all. I havnt been able to go to church thats another story. I’m not even a Catecumen I’m not sure. What am I? I belive in the catholic church the one true church.
Best to keep it simple.
- Have you been validly baptized?
- Do you have the desire, if not baptized?
- Do you have the opportunity?
- Is God merciful?
- Therefore, do not let your heart be troubled.
’ In the evening of life, we will be judged on our love.’ - St John of the Cross
You really should call and speak with a priest about your concerns.
If you were in circumstances where you could foresee your death, I have to think the priest would go ahead and baptize and confirm you with just minimal, basic instruction, followed by First Communion. I would, that’s all I can say. If by some miracle you were to recover, you could then be formally instructed and go through the experience of deeper spirituality, knowledge, and commitment.
As far as how I would describe myself, I would say “I have found Christ and have accepted him as Lord and Savior, I believe in the teachings of His Church, I worship at Holy Mass, and right now, I am studying and eagerly waiting to be baptized and to be received into the Catholic Church”.
Maybe not entirely, but I think it will make up a big part of God’s verdict.
You would probably have what is called a “Baptism of Desire”.
The greatest virtue is love - 1 Corinthians 13:13 - which leads us to…
…works of charity (love), upon which we will be judged - Rev 22:12.
St. John of the Cross is a Doctor of the Church, so he cannot be far off.
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