I live in the Netherlands and the majority of the country is protestant. I live in the south part of the country what is catholic. I have been raised catholic and I am very actif in the faith. My parents on the other hand have also been raised catholic, but do not believe anymore just like almost all people in my area. The problem is: I have commited the same mortal sin over and over for years and there is no possibility for me to go to confession. The first reason why I cannot go to confession is: The sacrament of penance has been abolished in my area years ago. The second reason is: I am afraid to go outside and leave the house and so I cannot go to confession. First I didn’t know it was a sin, but when I knew I tried to stop it, but I couldn’t. I feel very sorry and I pray to God three times a day. I also read the bible everyday and things about the faith. I have recently started praying the rosary every evening and that feels comfortable. I have now been able to reduce the number of times and I am repenting. I want to be worthy of God’s love and I do not want to sin against him again. I love the Lord with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. I have asked God for forgiveness just as the bible implies, but the Catholic Church teaches that one can only be forgiven by confession to a priest. What if that is not possible in my case? Does the Church also teach something about my situation? I do not want to go straight to the depths of hell. Could anyone please help?