"What If My Daughter Insists She Is a Male?" How a Catholic Priest Answered This Mother's Question.

see rcspirituality.org/ask-priest-daughter-insists-male/
“I fall in to the camp that sees this as one of the major lies of our current society,” this mother said. “My other children are judging me as being cruel, intolerant, judgmental, etc…”
This now involves a very live issue now as transgender ideology wins many people over.

Your link seems to be broken. I am also not following what the issue is.

The link worked for me.
The OP is just bringing to our attention the good advice offered by this priest, to pray, stay close to God and continue to love her daughter, while not submitting to lies.


The priest’s advice was sound.

Yes, it was.


The priest’s reply was sound. I only wish I could counsel people as well as that!

Note, however, that he does not answer the question of whether the mother should address the daughter by her new preferred male name.

I think the answer is implied in his response of “love the person, despise the malady”. The desire to be called by another (male) name, is merely a symptom of that malady, which is not to be pandered to or fed.

The issue is we don’t get to assign ourselves chromosomes.

I read an article about a month ago that talked about people born with both female and male reproductive organs. The article said it is as common as someone being born with red hair. What if this girl has female reproductive organs on the outside and on the inside she has male reproductive organs? The article I read said that there is people like this. I remember now. The article I read was about a model that was born like this.Here is the article nationalpost.com/m/wp/news/blog.html?b=news.nationalpost.com/news/0125-na-intersex

We all have our crosses to bear in life and it’s important for these folks to get spiritual direction to help them determine how to properly lead their lives.

I can say that big government and faux civil rights movements are not the answer.

I think it’s also really important to emphasize to people that it’s ok not to conform to gender stereotypes, eg it’s ok to be a woman and have short hair/play football and train as a plumber and it’s ok to be a man and like pink/do ballet and train as a make up artist. We need to take a deeper look at what’s behind a persons need to try to change sex.

There are different types of sex disorders and it’s definitely very isolating and hurtful. They tend to be ignored by religion :confused:

I don’t know about about all of them, but I was studying the development of sex in humans recently in school. Apparently there seems to be an underlying sex (ie “actual” sex) for some. A good doctor is definitely useful for those sort of stuff. Not that finding out your sex will solve everything, for some people, it is honestly rather painful. There is one where a person looks like a female at birth, and raised up as a female. But once puberty strikes, the person starts having masculine features and then it’s discovered that he is biologically male. Stuff like that can really break you. I honestly hope the Church actually speaks about stuff like this clearly.

Intersex is different than transgender.

Intersex people truly have a cross to bear, especially when well meaning parents cause them to be mutilated at birth to try to make them “normal”. It seems the sex decisions are rarely correct.

Unfortunately, this is not as simple an issue as people want to make it. It’s not that one day someone wakes up and decides they are really the opposite sex. My niece (now 20) started to say this as soon as she could clearly express herself at about age two. She never waivered from this and if you called her a girl when she insisted she was a boy, she would cry and say you were being mean. There was no trauma, no way she was brought up that to be a boy was better than being a girl.

Sexuality and Gender

This report presents a careful summary and an up-to-date explanation of research — from the biological, psychological, and social sciences — related to sexual orientation and gender identity. It is offered in the hope that such an exposition can contribute to our capacity as physicians, scientists, and citizens to address health issues faced by LGBT populations within our society.
Some key findings:
Part One: Sexual Orientation ● The understanding of sexual orientation as an innate, biologically fixed property of human beings — the idea that people are “born that way” — is not supported by scientific evidence.
● While there is evidence that biological factors such as genes and hormones are associated with sexual behaviors and attractions, there are no compelling causal biological explanations for human sexual orientation. While minor differences in the brain structures and brain activity between homosexual and heterosexual individuals have been identified by researchers, such neurobiological findings do not demonstrate whether these differences are innate or are the result of environmental and psychological factors.
● Longitudinal studies of adolescents suggest that sexual orientation may be quite fluid over the life course for some people, with one study estimating that as many as 80% of male adolescents who report same-sex attractions no longer do so as adults (although the extent to which this figure reflects actual changes in same-sex attractions and not just artifacts of the survey process has been contested by some researchers).
● Compared to heterosexuals, non-heterosexuals are about two to three times as likely to have experienced childhood sexual abuse.
Part Two: Sexuality, Mental Health Outcomes, and Social Stress ● Compared to the general population, non-heterosexual subpopulations are at an elevated risk for a variety of adverse health and mental health outcomes.
● Members of the non-heterosexual population are estimated to have about 1.5 times higher risk of experiencing anxiety disorders than members of the heterosexual population, as well as roughly double the risk of depression, 1.5 times the risk of substance abuse, and nearly 2.5 times the risk of suicide.
● Members of the transgender population are also at higher risk of a variety of mental health problems compared to members of the non-transgender population. Especially alarmingly, the rate of lifetime suicide attempts across all ages of transgender individuals is estimated at 41%, compared to under 5% in the overall U.S. population.
● There is evidence, albeit limited, that social stressors such as discrimination and stigma contribute to the elevated risk of poor mental health outcomes for non-heterosexual and transgender populations. More high-quality longitudinal studies are necessary for the “social stress model” to be a useful tool for understanding public health concerns.
Part Three: Gender Identity ● The hypothesis that gender identity is an innate, fixed property of human beings that is independent of biological sex — that a person might be “a man trapped in a woman’s body” or “a woman trapped in a man’s body” — is not supported by scientific evidence.
● According to a recent estimate, about 0.6% of U.S. adults identify as a gender that does not correspond to their biological sex.
● Studies comparing the brain structures of transgender and non-transgender individuals have demonstrated weak correlations between brain structure and cross-gender identification. These correlations do not provide any evidence for a neurobiological basis for cross-gender identification.
● Compared to the general population, adults who have undergone sex-reassignment surgery continue to have a higher risk of experiencing poor mental health outcomes. One study found that, compared to controls, sex-reassigned individuals were about 5 times more likely to attempt suicide and about 19 times more likely to die by suicide.
● Children are a special case when addressing transgender issues. Only a minority of children who experience cross-gender identification will continue to do so into adolescence or adulthood.
● There is little scientific evidence for the therapeutic value of interventions that delay puberty or modify the secondary sex characteristics of adolescents, although some children may have improved psychological well-being if they are encouraged and supported in their cross-gender identification. There is no evidence that all children who express gender-atypical thoughts or behavior should be encouraged to become transgender.

American Psychological Association Course Correction: Sexual Orientation and ‘Gender Identity’ Not Fixed After All

No doubt Diamond’s conclusions causes alarm in the ranks of Gay INC. Haynes writes:
Dr. Diamond tells LGBT activists near the end of her YouTube lecture, “I feel as a community, the queers have to stop saying, ‘Please help us. We’re born this way, and we can’t change’ as an argument for legal standing. I don’t think we need that argument, and that argument is going to bite us in the ***, because now we know that there’s enough data out there, that the other side is aware of as much as we are aware of it.” In other words, Dr. Diamond says, “Stop saying ‘born that way and can’t change’ for political purposes, because the other side knows it’s not true as much as we do.”

Gender Ideology Harms Children

I believe the Priest’s advice is not wholly sound on the scientific side.
“Don’t lose hope. Eventually the truth “will come out.” Your daughter was created female, and there is no changing that.”

Just as it seems that some homosexuals are born not made so too here.
The question is not biological sex type but “gender”.

Science is increasingly providing evidence that “gender” is objectively determined not simply by the visible genitals but also by the structure of the brain and hormones generated internally.

I believe we have to be open to this objective basis for children from a young age gender identifying themselves as possibly opposite to what their genitals “say”.
Nature is not perfect and there is no reason why, if gender is biologically more than external genitals, nature sometimes does not line up all the matching ducks in a row as it were.

This is not to say that ideology and “not fitting in” can also be responsible.
However, if someone from an early age identifies opposite to their biology and no obvious trauma is responsible then to hold up “nature” (ie external genitals) as being the sole criterion of what is true and how to respond is a flawed approach.

On a practical level a mother surely has the right to say what goes while a child is living at home and how she/he is to be addressed by the family.

If the child has left home and is in fact independent then her own wishes should surely be respected…especially if ignoring her wishes is likely to break down the relationship. One can of course still lovingly say how much it hurts to address her as a son when in fact you regard her as her baby girl…but in the end if opposition is not going to change the situation
then every true parent knows they must sacrifice themselves for their children’s good.
If they have left home it is in the end between them and God and ruining the relationship doesn’t help. One can still have a good relationship where both parties are honest and understand the pain the other is causing…and yet concede to the reasonable wishes of the grown up daughter. That is real love and if anything can change things then this sacrifice by the mother will.

And if it doesn’t, well that is then up to God.

I also note that Buffalo’s “scientific” view below is weak.
It comes from an organisation that appears to have a set bias, the Report is not peer reviewed, nor was it published in a “scientific journal" where it could be critiqued by world leading experts whose actual research suggests otherwise.

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