What Is A Man?

Hello all:

I’ve been thinking about how what it means to be a man and to be masculine is very confused in American culture.

What does the Catholic Church say a man should be? What separates him from women or a boy?

Also this might be in the wrong place. I am sorry if it is.


I have been interested in this question myself. I actually found a good description though I am not sure if the writer is Catholic. (peacefulwife.com/2013/02/04/gods-design-for-masculinity/)

True masculinity has remained a mystery (and true femininity) to a large extent. Men really need to change that because we are being marginalized by society.

Look to Saint Joseph. That is the model for a man.


I have also been pondering the same question. Our society is confused about the difference between being a man and being a male. I hear it all the time. One of the most common I hear from married guys is “Of course I look at other women, I’m a MAN!” That makes them a male. A man is committed to his wife, to the point where he has no interest in another woman. A male is interested in ogling as many women as he can in order to fulfill disordered sexual desires. The same goes with pornography usage. Real men do not look at pornography, nor do they masturbate.

A man knows when to turn the other cheek, and when it is time to defend himself and his loved ones. A man is willing to sacrifice everything for his family, even his own life.

THIS is the definition of manliness!

Well I’m a woman, but i can give you an example.
My dad when he was young attended summer school so he could graduate early from highschool and try to get some sort of job to help the family out during the depression. When World War Two came he had a deferment because he was working at Briggs and Stratton in Milwaukee but told grandpa he was going in anyways because daddy felt that was the right think to do.He spent 33 years in the airforce 1942-1975 mainly working in military intelligence and recieved numerous medals for his service.
When he met momma in Buffalo;Ny he was an instructor at the ROTC Program at the University of Buffalo.He did not date or run around with other women while he was seeing her.When we kids came along he could diepar and feed usetc.As kids he would take us for walks;tell us stories and take us on picnics and such.We could go to our parents for advice and he could tell us if someone was handing us a bunch of lies or not.IWe learned a lot about history becuase our parents were always reading. He knew a great deal of history they don’t bother teaching in school .Sure momma and daddy argued about money but all couples do.He never hit momma He could fix things around the house and was willing to help our neighbors if they had car problems or whatever.
When momma died in 1982 from a stroke daddy never remarried.He died in 1996.
He was a caring decent man who loved his country and his family.Course he had a good example in his father and grandfather too which makes a big difference.
The point is he was a good role model for a young man.So was St.Joseph.He protected Mary and jesus when they fled into Egypt and he taught Jesus many lessons to help Him in life.Use St.Joseph as your example.You also have St.Thomas More and other married saints to choose from to model yourself after.

Great answer!

OP, I suggest reading the book “Be a Man” by Fr Larry Richards. When I read it and was able to start living it, it changed my life.

Christ is the best model for all men. The way he loved without counting the cost is what a man should strive for in his everyday life.

The bible, or as I would put it the owner’s manual to being a real man or real woman. The bible is the inspired word of God. He would know better what it takes to be a real man. After all, He created us in his own image. We want to be men, but not in a superficial way. Follow God’s prescription. You can’t go wrong. Same goes for women. Jesus reminds us to do the will of our Heavenly Father.

My husband really likes this website, which covers a wide range off issues, from chivalry to shaving:


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