What is the role of a spiritual director


#1

As the title says, exactly what is the role of a spiritual director? Is it like a psychiatrist ? (yes I really need to ask), is it like a bible sutdy teacher? Is it like a confessor.

I remember almost 10 years ago going to see one once (Not sure what my motivation was). However, I never went back because she asked me if I was angry at God. I told her that I wanted to discuss something else (not that I remember what) and she kept bringing me back to ‘angry at God’ and pushing my buttons until I said ‘Fine, I am mad at him’. Not because I was mad at him but because I knew it was the only way to shut her up. To which she respond ‘Good it is about time you got honest about it’ as she pounded her fist on the table

I remember thinking ‘the only person I am mad at is you for not listening to what I wanted to talk about and I only said I was angry at God because you manipulated me to’

So… obviously (in my opinion) I had a bad one. I am just wondering what a good one is like.

Thanks

CM


#2

[quote="cmscms, post:1, topic:244409"]
As the title says, exactly what is the role of a spiritual director? Is it like a psychiatrist ? (yes I really need to ask), is it like a bible sutdy teacher? Is it like a confessor.

I
CM

[/quote]

none of these things, although if your director is a priest, he may hear your confession if you ask him. In fact, if you seem to be getting in to areas that seem to need psychological counselling he will probably refer you to that professional and not see your for direction until you have those issues under control.

sorry you had a bad experience but not sure what your question is
here is result of search on spirituality forum and the best threads discussion SD are here
forums.catholic.com/search.php?searchid=8680978


#3

Sometimes you have to go through a few SDs before you find one that is the right "fit" for both of you. That is why the first sessions should be a way of sizing each other up, so to speak. It is a time to ask questions....how often to meet, what does the director expect, what does the directee expect. It is a time to talk about your life, what brings you to direction. Some directors think they are actually psychologists (they are not), or they bring their own issues into the direction sessions. A good director lets the directee in a sense, lead and then the director picks up on what the person is saying. The director doesn't tell you what to do, but helps you to decide what God wants you to do.

The fact that she was telling you that you are angry with God could be because she picked up something in what you said or in the tone of your voice. I have been asked that question by my director but he basically didn't push it but told me to pray about the idea that I might be. It led into a good discussion. But as I see it, the difference between what your former director said and what mine said was that mine didn't push it. He allowed me to delve into myself and to talk about it. In other words, he LISTENED TO ME. That is an important gift that a good director has, the ability to listen and not dictate. A director shows one the way, he does not push one on the path he or she wants the directee to go.

Good luck in finding a good director. They are a God send if you find one that "fits".


#4

Hi,

A SD is one who you go and talk to. They ask questions how you are doing spiritually, and based off of your answers they direct you or counsel you to do certain things that would bring you closer to God and to His Church. When I say counseling I do not mean the counseling between a psychologist and a patient, though sometimes if needed it can turn that way. Usually the SD will set boundaries up when beginning to work with someone. A good SD will always give counsel and never make the directee feel apprehensive about whether they follow the counsel or not.

My SD is a priest and he hears my confessions as well. I usually see him at least once a week because of things going on in my life.

I will be praying that you find the SD that God wishes for you to have. I would recommend looking for a priest. Lay spiritual directors are good in their own ways, but there's something about having one who is in persona Christe. And if things come up, it is quite handy to have a priest because you can go to Confession.

God bless.


#5

Thank you for your responses but I am still a bit unclear. Is the role of a SD to help you hear God's direction more clearly?

Thanks

CM


#6

[quote="cmscms, post:5, topic:244409"]
Thank you for your responses but I am still a bit unclear. Is the role of a SD to help you hear God's direction more clearly?

Thanks

CM

[/quote]

Exactly!


#7

Here is a series on the topic that answers your question. This link is to the last post in the series and the rest are at the bottom of the post. They are all short and quick/easy read. I think they will be very helpful to you. Let me know if they are not.


#8

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