What to do if you don't have anyone to talk about very personal stuff?

I’m a shy guy,in my 20’s, not early 20’s… i have always been a very reserved person… i have a very hard time trusting my secrets to other people. When i was a child and a teenager, i used to share my secrets with my parents or siblings, and most of the time, they ended up telling other people about my secrets…That’s why i’m unable to trust my secrets to other people… At this moment, i’m very very sad, i don’t know what to do about the sin of lust. I’m very guilty of these type of sins. I always confess my sins to the priest, however, because of my shyness, i don’t have a close relationship with him… I wish there was a man in my life to talk about these issues, however, my dad lives in another country, and even if we lived in the same house, i couldn’t trust him these secrets, because i don’t think he would keep the secrets, and besides most likely he wouldn’t understand, he would get mad at me and that’s it… … i also have a brother… he’s a good brother, however, he has proven to be unable to keep secrets.
what should i do.

this sounds pathetic, but if you’re a man, older than 40 or 50 or 60 or 70 or 80 or 90, could you please be my friend? could you please listen to me? could you please give me advice? could you please help me to be a good catholic? if so, could i send you privates telling you about my problems?

thank you guys for your time
God bless you

I am only 31. But you can PM me if you want.

I’d highly recommend setting an appointment with a good priest. I had done of my best therapy from a good priest. It will do you wonders.

I am so sorry to hear that you are carrying this burden by yourself. I am a 55 year old guy and if I can help in anyway PM me and we can go from there. Until then you are in my prayers.

I’m a girl, and only 17 at that, but I can relate, I’m very reserved too, and my family is the same way, I tell someone something, and then everyone else knows. What helps me is writing letters to God, Mary, and the saints. I know it’s not the same as physically talking to someone and getting advice, making friends, but for me at least, it’s really comforting. It’s something that’s always helped me relax…

The OP does not need an internet friend. Someone on the internet who you never met isn’t a friend. They have no idea who you are, your background, upbringing, etc. It is dangerous to tell your deepest personal secrets to someone on the internet whom you never met.

The OP needs to find a spiritual director - someone who can help him advance in holiness.

He needs to join a Bible study or a bicycle club or photography club or get into the Knights of Columbus or do some volunteer work in order to meet some people.


OP: I will pray for you. It’s unfortunate that your family members have betrayed your trust in the past, and I hope you meet some Catholics with whom you can share comfortably. I am a lot younger than your desired demographic, but feel free to send me a PM if you want.

I agree with this.

One can have good conversations with people on the internet. It’s necessary to be prudent, of course. Internet friends also cannot be substitutes for friends you can meet in person. Especially if you are shy, you should try to get involved in some things and seek contexts where you can speak to people face to face.

I totally agree but I offered to talk with him so as not to just shut him out. Ultimately he will need to speak with someone face to face but **it is obvious by his post that this is his greatest issue. **We are real people here that can help and if it springboards him to see someone personally then that is the ultimate goal. But, as I read his post, he is not there yet and even though I may not be a close friend I am his brother in Christ. As a catechist for adults and children I have often had people come and speak with me about personal issues and I help them to a degree but then always refer them further.

So, I don’t think that we should continue to recommend that he seeks personal one on one yet since that is not comfortable for him at this point. And, I believe, that if we direct him that way he will just simply give up. He wants an anonymous person to bounce off of and that is what we should offer him at this time. God bless. :slight_smile:

I certainly share your thoughts …the best advice so far.:thumbsup:

Thank you. :thumbsup:

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