The Lord Jesus Christ
100 St. Peter’s Way
Thank you for your letter. It isn’t often I get mail from Bolgia 9 in the 8th Circle. I regret that I cannot renounce my divinity and recognize you as a prophet as you demand. Also I realize you are displeased with the condition in which you find yourself. However, I would remind you that you freely chose your state and refused repentence. The gates of hell are locked on the inside, so if you have the right keys you can open them and enter heaven. We would be pleased to have you here.
As a courtesy I will freely offer you those keys. First, admit the truth about yourself. You were not, and are not, a prophet. I didn’t send you. You denied the Holy Trinity, the Incarnation, the Redemption, and my Resurrection. Instead you created your own scriptures. Often these pandered to your own debased desires. Where in the world did you get the idea that God would allow you to marry a nine year old child? That was not from me! You claim you saw an angel. Yes, you did. But it was a fallen one and you listened. You were wrong. Instead of starting your own faith you should have entered my Church.
The second key is to repent. Repent of your sins. You were not a perfect man. You committed murder, child abuse, rape, theft, and a vast array of other sins. Pride was your worst fault. It is the main thing that keeps you where you are right now. Your falsehoods and violence have spread throughout the world causing untold misery. Today the religion you founded is known primarily for its terrorism. I could have told you that would be the result since it was based on a lie, but you would not listen to me.
The third key is to confess the true faith. Praise the one true God-Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Acknowledge me as your Lord and God. Bend your knee. See my wounds and realize they are for love of you. Accept the love of your God and begin, by grace, to love back. It will be hard at first, but it will be a joy. Then you will know true love and will become a son of the Father and will reign with Us forever.
I sincerely hope that you will listen to me now. I await you with open arms. The only one keeping you in hell is you.