I have no idea where to put this so it can be a prayer too
I go to a mental health charity quite regularly. I have also been doing my own bit at really building myself up for work by working on my numeracy and going into school one day a week. I have kept going when other times I would have skipped a day. (Though not saying I haven’t skipped days). But through a totally seperate talk with my parish priest he has helped enormously without him realising about facing my own fear of work. He knows he has helped but whether he is aware of quite how much…
Anyway last month at a Breakfast group session the workers started discussing the new benefit form that we have to do now in UK for change over of benefits. I haven’t asked for any help with filling out the form. I wont get any help in attending the medical. Which I will fail because they fail you apparently if you are not with someone. But that is beside the way side as such.
The problem is that I was basically targeted in the group for not doing anything to help myself over the year when they know I have because I have actually asked for help with the teaching assistants course itself because got very stuck - I have since quit the course because the course tutor couldn’t find any problem with my work and wasn’t able to hear when I did try to say I can’t open the folder - foggy brain when I do. I mentioned this at Mind and didn’t get any help there too. So feel very annoyed that when I have asked for help I am being accused of not finding work. Remembering too that I am working on numeracy and received a new way of thinking about work from the priest…
Last week was a different topic but yesterday it was back to not doing anything again. I just happened to offer that I like cleaning because you can go in and do the work and come out and concentrate life on hobbies etc. One person started to say then, there you go, you came into the group not knowing what you wanted to do and… I did quickly jump in and point out that I have been going into school one day a week for nearly a year. I didn’t share the whole meaning of the energy I put into that. She did have the audicy to shut up but I received no recognition for that I am doing stuff to find work. Not that I want any from them but when one is being accused of not doing anything when I have made personal leaps in that area.
Do I complain? If I complain then I am basically out of that group because the worker don’t take complaints very well as such. So its knowing how to complain. I need to say something but how and what because I do feel very hurt about not being heard.
What would any of you do please?