What's wrong with marrying a non-virgin?


#1

Is there something wrong with marrying a non-virgin?


#2

No. There's not.


#3

I don’t think there is. Lots of people are non-virgins. People fall into temptation it happens. If they are repentant, have sought out confession, and desire to live chastely until marriage I don’t see any problems with it.


#4

…only if their current attitude to sex is out of line with the Church.

or if you personally can’t handle their past.


#5

[quote="ShanaA1984, post:3, topic:303102"]
I don't think there is. Lots of people are non-virgins. People fall into temptation it happens. If they are repentant, have sought out confession, and desire to live chastely until marriage I don't see any problems with it.

[/quote]

:thumbsup:

I would just add that depending on their past, I would have them medically checked for STD.


#6

[quote="cmscms, post:5, topic:303102"]
:thumbsup:

I would just add that depending on their past, I would have them medically checked for STD.

[/quote]

FYI: some STDs can go undetected. They're "latent."

[quote="DlandFan06, post:1, topic:303102"]
Is there something wrong with marrying a non-virgin?

[/quote]

Other than STDs, higher potential for infidelity, poor attitudes towards sex, persistent thoughts about it, and a few more things, there's nothing wrong, per se. There's also nothing wrong with not wanting to marry a non-virgin, although you'd think a person like that would be a war criminal based on the comments around here.


#7

That’s what I thought. Another post on another thread seemed that it was bad to marry a non-virgin.


#8

Yeah, that’s true.


#9

[quote="DlandFan06, post:1, topic:303102"]
Is there something wrong with marrying a non-virgin?

[/quote]

Pope Pius XXVIII infallibly declared the act of marrying a female non-virgin to be an unforgivable mortal sin worse than adultery, torture, and murder. Somewhat controversially, in a move that still seems to cause widespread confusion among the faithful, especially those of a Feminist bent, who still haven't decided on whether they should complain or not, he then stated that women who wed male non-virgins only get between 200 and 850 years worth of suffering in purgatory.

So yeah.


#10

[quote="DlandFan06, post:7, topic:303102"]
That's what I thought. Another post on another thread seemed that it was bad to marry a non-virgin.

[/quote]

There are consequences that must be dealt with when marrying a non-virgin that are avoided when marrying a virgin.


#11

[quote="In_Spiration, post:9, topic:303102"]
Pope Pius XXVIII infallibly declared the act of marrying a female non-virgin to be an unforgivable mortal sin worse than adultery, torture, and murder. Somewhat controversially, in a move that still seems to cause widespread confusion among the faithful, especially those of a Feminist bent, who still haven't decided on whether they should complain or not, he then stated that women who wed male non-virgins only get between 200 and 850 years worth of suffering in purgatory.

So yeah.

[/quote]

Umm... not sure if you're being sarcastic and just joking or not and think that's true, but there was no Pope Pius XXVII. The last Pope Pius was Pope Pius XII. And there is only one unforgivable sin, blaspheming of the Holy Spirit.


#12

[quote="DlandFan06, post:1, topic:303102"]
Is there something wrong with marrying a non-virgin?

[/quote]

No, not really. Though it will pretty much always be the case that non-virgins will have more emotional/sexual baggage you need to deal with which can be damagaing to a relationship. Mind you, being a virgin is no gaurantee that they won't have such emotional/sexual baggage. But especially if they're slept around I wwould be extremely careful, the kind of attitude that leads to sleeping around is kind of hard to shake. It is very different from someone who made a one-time mistake and regrets it and has repented etc. they both will have some degree of baggage to deal with, but the latter far far less than the former. That doesn't mean that non-virgins are dirt and deserve to live lonely lives, but just be careful and prudent about the choices you make bbeccause they will have consequences.

So yeah, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. If you meet someone you think you might be called to marry and find out they are a non-virgin, think about it, pray about it, and don't make any rash decisions either direction. :)


#13


#14

[quote="bzkoss236, post:11, topic:303102"]
Umm... not sure if you're being sarcastic and just joking or not and think that's true, but there was no Pope Pius XXVII. The last Pope Pius was Pope Pius XII. And there is only one unforgivable sin, blaspheming of the Holy Spirit.

[/quote]

I was about say the same thing but you beat me to it :D


#15

[quote="thewanderer, post:12, topic:303102"]
No, not really. Though it will pretty much always be the case that non-virgins will have more emotional/sexual baggage you need to deal with which can be damagaing to a relationship. Mind you, being a virgin is no gaurantee that they won't have such emotional/sexual baggage. But especially if they're slept around I wwould be extremely careful, the kind of attitude that leads to sleeping around is kind of hard to shake. It is very different from someone who made a one-time mistake and regrets it and has repented etc. they both will have some degree of baggage to deal with, but the latter far far less than the former. That doesn't mean that non-virgins are dirt and deserve to live lonely lives, but just be careful and prudent about the choices you make bbeccause they will have consequences.

So yeah, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. If you meet someone you think you might be called to marry and find out they are a non-virgin, think about it, pray about it, and don't make any rash decisions either direction. :)

[/quote]

There's nothing wrong with it.


#16

[quote="thewanderer, post:12, topic:303102"]
It is very different from someone who made a one-time mistake and regrets it and has repented etc. they both will have some degree of baggage to deal with, but the latter far far less than the former. That doesn't mean that non-virgins are dirt and deserve to live lonely lives, but just be careful and prudent about the choices you make bbeccause they will have consequences.

[/quote]

Sorry but even a virgin like myself has a TON of sexual sins that can equal a regrettable one-night stand.

Let's not forget that when it comes to lust, the mind's already a good breeding ground and needs no actual sexual encounter.


#17

[quote="Hicks, post:15, topic:303102"]
There's nothing wrong with it.

[/quote]

Lol, if you read what I said, I agreed with you, in fact, I said there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, so I really don't know why you are responding to me as though I disagree with you. I was simply pointing out a few problems that will quite possibly need to be faced if you marry a non-virgin. No matter who you marry you are going to face particular problems, but it's better to know about them ahead of time if you can. Again, I really don't understand why you are picking on my post. I will again clariy ** There is nothing wrong with marrying a non-virgin**.


#18

[quote="Lost_Wanderer, post:16, topic:303102"]
Sorry but even a virgin like myself has a TON of sexual sins that can equal a regrettable one-night stand.

Let's not forget that when it comes to lust, the mind's already a good breeding ground and needs no actual sexual encounter.

[/quote]

Yes, you are certainly right, if I didn't make that point I am sorry for leaving it out. What makes a difference is purity and one's understanding of the meaning of sexuality. It is very possible to be very impure and have all sorts of emotional baggage even if one is still a virgin. Being a virgin does not mean one is pure or holy. This is N important point. To bring up.:thumbsup:


#19

[quote="ShanaA1984, post:3, topic:303102"]
I don't think there is. Lots of people are non-virgins. People fall into temptation it happens. If they are repentant, have sought out confession, and desire to live chastely until marriage I don't see any problems with it.

[/quote]

I agree with you ..
Have you guys forgotten what happen to Mary Magdalina ,when she was brought before Jesus and asked what he thought .’Let him who is without sin cast the 1st stone” Jesus said ,and we all know what happened ,so who are we to judge if it is right or wrong to marry a non virgin .. 1 out let say 100 girls/boys in today’s day and ages are not virgins anymore .People the reality of the matter is that children as young as 10 out there in the world is sexually active . and if we are standing in judgement !!!!! what do you guys think Jesus would have done ????


#20

One of the saints is quoted as saying "Lord, make me chaste -- but not yet." I have forgotten which saint it was - it may have been Ignatius of Loyola (that would fit his earlier life) - but if his prayer could be like that, it is certainly a forgivable act. I do believe that, men more than women would carry a concern that a non-virgin wife would be more easily tempted and it could be a cause of trouble and jealousy in the marriage. Girls (women) seem to have more acceptance of the male's difficulty in remaining chaste.


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